Happy Valves and Thymes Day!!!
What it be like, folks? Happy Valentine’s Day to everyones. It’s a day of increased expectations, men sleeping on couches and new seeds being planted (mmhmm…). It’s also a day of bitter Facebook statuses or bragging ones. To all the single ladies on Valves and Thymes Day, don’t write bitter …
Whose T-Shirt Is This? Jesus Ain’t Sanction It
One of my readers passed this pic to me, and all I did was give EXTREME side-eye. Sir… I’m pretty sure Jesus, nor his disciples, nor Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, Shadrack, Meshack or the Billy Goat, sanctioned the existence of this shirt. I mean, I respect his fervor and passion …
Oregon Trail is Now On Facebook. iLIVE!!!
So today, I found out that the Oregon Trail app is now on Facebook! OREGON MUFUGGING TRAIL!!! The epic game from our childhood where you were a settler taking a 2,000 mile across the treacherous oregon trail with a wagon full of people, and ox pulling the wagon. During the …
SnowtoriousBIG is Here! Stay Safe, Chitowners!
As you all know, we’re in the midst of SnowtoriousBIG, the goon ass blizzard that is coming through Chicago and the Midwest. Skinny people of Chicago! If you’re going outside today, please wear a heavy backpack so you don’t get blown away by the wind. Kthx! Don’t get Dorothy’ed from …
These Suitcase Decals Are TSA’s Worst Nightmare
I was loitering at my quiet corner of the interwebs a coupla months ago (Tumblr) when I came across these: What are these, you might ask? They’re suitcase decals that you can buy and stick on your luggage to travel with. You take these huge stickers, place them on your …
If Tupac Met Malcolm X, They’d Side-Eye This Painting Together
At this point in time, y’all already know I spend WAY too much of my time and days loitering on the Den of Iniquity that is Twitter. Yesterday was no different. I was minding my own business (O__o) when someone posted a link to a twitpic by Tyrese. It was… …
What’s Your Zodiac Sign? I Don’t Know Anymore! *Wall Slide*
I woke up today and found out something that has just murked me considerably. Apparently, the Earth has changed alignment and something something something relation to the moon blah blah axis womp blah. But somehow this change that happened has affected the zodiac, and has changed it considerably. So now, …
“The Game” Premiere Played Bald-headed Games! I Have Questions
So last night was the highly anticipated premiere of the TV show “The Game.” You know, the one that’s been off air for 2 years because CW kicked it to the curb. So fans lobbied for it like our health insurance depended on it. Yes, that one. BET picked it …
Skinny Girl Problems Are Real
Skinny girl problems are REAL, and it is not our fault that our metabolisms are faster than Usain Bolt. I’m here to share with you what some of them are. Before I start, lemme say yes, I am aware that there’s a fat girl problem to counteract each of these. …
Ted Williams and His Golden Voice: Thug Murker of the Week
As you all know, I’m a thug. I make babies cry by mean mugging them. I punch teddy bears just because. However, there are certain things that grab my attention and render my thug obsolete. Some stuff makes my thug pick up its’ luggage and go on vacation. These are …