On Fraudulent Fame, Fulfilled Feelings and Floral Flourish

Last week, I told you I made Angela Bassett cry. Well, it was at the Leading Women Defined Conference and I was chosen to be one of six people to do a short tribute to her.
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I had 2 minutes, so I talked about one of my fave on-screen quotes from her: “I am the queen of the most powerful nation in the world and my whole family is gone! Have I not given everything?” 👑 And how much it made me feel seen as a Black woman. And then I read the oriki I wrote for her last year, after the Academy Awards where she was (once again) snubbed. It was clearly for such a time as this.

​Watch the reel here.

I was so nervous as I did it too, because she truly is a beacon who I’ve admired for so long. And when I was done, I walked on stage and handed her flowers, and her face was wet. 😭😭😭

Even watching the ​video​ of that moment back felt like an out of body experience. Getting the chance to share with Angela what her work has meant to me and show that appreciation is a 2024 highlight. It’s not often you get to tell someone who has their name in lights for the world how much her work made me feel seen as a Black woman.

When we share our gifts and who we are with one another, the world gets a bit better for all of us. 🌎❤️

RANT

Scamming is becoming the way to get famous.

Is it me or does it seem like now the quickest way to get famous is to scam folks. Between all the documentaries about billion dollar companies built on legos, vibes and fake math/science, Legion and others, I’m seeing this and it’s weird. To scam, admit it, tell the story, gets you famous, book deals and attention and I’m really starting to hate that for us all. 😤

We live in a world where people are more concerned with being seen than with being heard, more focused on followers than on friendships, and more obsessed with likes than with love. And they’re so concerned with being seen, that they’re willing to make it happen at whatever cost. 🤦🏾‍♀️

We’re literally rewarding people with millions of dollars for behaving badly. Folks out here chasing clout, chasing coins, chasing likes and follows without a second thought. 😒

Lowkey I’m part of the problem 🫣 because I LOVE watching white mess documentaries. The cult docs where there is one Black women truthteller and the main character is a white person with bad hair. It’s entertaining AF. But my watching is even proof that this scam formula works. 🫣

Do I know the answer to this? No. But I do want scamming to not be so popular and I want it to stop being so monetizable.

REFLECTION

Flowers aren’t just for funerals.

I think about how often we let the love we have go unexpressed. How many things have we left unsaid? 🤔💭

I think we take for granted the folks we know and love (and even those we don’t know) and we hoard appreciation and feedback. We think “well, they know how we feel.” And they might know, but have we shown it?

Yes, I get everyone’s love language isn’t words of affirmation, but dang it if it doesn’t feel good to be gassed up. The feedback my video to Angela Bassett has gotten, brought this back to the forefront for me. One thing everyone who was in that room said, was that she looked like she felt SEEN, and if that ain’t one of the most powerful things we can feel. Especially as the world does all it can to degrade us.

Appreciation, it turns out, is more than just a word. It’s an action, a choice, a way of living. It’s looking someone in the eye and saying, “I see you. I value you. You matter.”

These days we are constantly bombarded with messages of not being enough, of having to strive for more. And with all that noise swirling around us, having someone stop and let you know you are valued just as you are is a balm for the weary soul. It’s an easy gift to give someone who has touched your life. 🤲🏾❤️‍🩹

We all crave validation. We all want to feel seen, heard, and valued for who we are and what we bring to the table. And when someone goes out of their way to make us feel seen, whether it’s through a kind word, a thoughtful gesture, or a simple act of recognition, it’s like a light shining through the darkness, reminding us that we matter.

A kind word or a heartfelt thank you can set off a cascade of positivity, inspiring others to pause and appreciate the beauty in their lives. It’s a reminder that in the hustle and bustle of daily life, we have the power to create islands of calm, moments of profound connection that remind us of what truly matters.

So, think of someone who deserves their flowers from you and make sure you set aside time this week to let them know how much you appreciate them. It might just be the most important thing you do all week. 🌼

RECOMMENDATION

Give someone flowers this week.

One thing I do almost every week, is buy someone in my life flowers. 🌸 Whether they are friends, mentors or business partners. It’s really important that I show people that I appreciate them. Sometimes, it’s because it’s their birthday, sometimes, it’s after we’ve completed a project, and sometimes, it’s just because they popped up in my mind.

I recently sent one of my mentors flowers and she sent me a note saying she had has a rough month, and that the flowers I sent her made her cry. And that touched me! 🥹

So, my recommendation this week is that you identify one person in your life, and you send them flowers. And I LOVE ​Urban Stems​, a Black-owned florist service. They deliver nationwide and their bouquets are beautiful! 💐

Brighten up someone’s day and their home. Leave a short note that will make them feel appreciated. And watch that appreciation come right back to you in multitudes.

GIVE FLOWERS

And by the way, maybe you send YOURSELF some flowers too. I do that from time to time to remind myself that I’m THAT GIRL and I deserve it.

Sooo tell me. Who are you going to send flowers to this week?

Disclaimer: I receive commissions for purchases made through some of the links in this newsletter. All thoughts and vouching are mine. I keep it true.

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