Music

Chingy’s Album Sold 683 Copies and Went Credit Score

Classic albums go gold, platinum and diamond. Michael Jackson’s albums went plutonium and sh*t because they ran out of metals awesome enough to describe their level of DOPENESS. This was in the past though. It seems that albums don’t fare as well nowadays. Not even close.

ChingyFirst, Kelis dropped an album and sold 7,500 copies. Then I find out that Chingy just came out with an album, and it sold 683 copies.

*blinks*
*stares*

683 COPIES. That wasn’t a typo. There wasn’t a 0 missing. It just wasn’t there. 683 CDs??? That’s all you gon sell? #NoShade my dude, but 683 album sales? Was it only released in Iowa? What happened? You can tell a G. (-__-)

Then my homie George of ThisAintThat.com gon say “I wanna meet the 683 people that bought it. I wanna know if they bought it on purpose.” LMAO! No Country For Failing Rappers.

683 though??? That’s a CREDIT score, not album sales. That isn’t even A1 credit. He coulda sold 50 more albums & still not beat some folks’ credit scores. Someone get that boy an intern A&R. He got Kizzy Rowlanded! That’s the only way one can account for this failure. Like they made it an effort to keep his album release a secret. Womp.

Chingy’s album went:

  • To his Mama’s basement. With 683 sold, he musta got just like half the folks on his FB friends list to buy it. I’m kinda sad about that.
  • Cloth diaper. Clearly the whole world done shitted on him collectively with the cold shoulder he got. Po’ thang.
  • Junk mail. I wonder what plaque you get for that. Maybe a silver-colored letter opener? That’ll be nice.
  • Bus card, which, coincidentally is all he can prolly afford now. THAT, my friends, is tragical.

I can’t rap. Or sing. Or do things that involve tune. But I bet I could release an album and go AT LEAST remote control. Chingy… (-_-) Like DAMB. #ChingysAlbumWent plastic fork and ain’t nobody even ask how HE DEWIN? Y’all are selfish in so many ways. Po’ thang. Does he have PayPal? Is he taking donations? That’s just a mess. Even Kelis has the right to roast him.

Ya know how you went to high school with someone who became a successful rapper? Well Chingy’s high school friends can’t say that right now. Maybe in 2002 they could. I wonder how they feel. THESE are the important things to wonder.

LMAO!!! @__dutch twitpiced this and I fell out.

Someone told Chingy “gimme what you got for a porkchop.” And Chingy handed over a nickel (what he earned from album sales).

Ok I’m done. I’m done. Let me leave him alone. Chingy was somebody back in the day. When “Right Thurr” came out, I did the chicken head dance so hard that I got dizzy. That went HARD. What happened to them days?

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20 Comments

  1. Capricorn
    September 29, 2010 at 8:47 am

    Remember that Chingy and my 3rd baby fava Ludacris got into some beef? Then we didnt hear from Chingy for a minute. I heard they patched things up and the album came out. But 683 copies? If I play Holidae Inn on my ipod right now, will Chingy get a cut?

  2. September 29, 2010 at 9:22 am

    Damnit all to Hades Luvvie. You gone get me fired for real one of these day.

    I’m with Capricorn…I’m calling radio stations right now so this brotha can get some residuals.

  3. September 29, 2010 at 9:57 am

    Ha ha ha ha hilarious! Girl you is a mess!

  4. September 29, 2010 at 11:15 am

    Now see Chingy’s album sales got the Gout and couldn’t make it out. I hear the Gout is bad round them parts. Po ting

  5. September 29, 2010 at 12:44 pm

    Fail! His album didn’t even go MySpace. Somewhere, the guy always trying to sell me gospel rap CDs while I’m pumping gas has got to be laughing. JoWork and 50 Tyson have commas in their sales and they don’t have labels. Clearly, Twitter followers don’t mean isht for album sales. Selling 683 copies won’t get you a night at the “Holidae Inn” SMH

  6. Lite Bread
    September 29, 2010 at 2:48 pm

    Yer Most Economically Awesomelynessis,
    “That ain’t no daum Credit Score!
    (Watch YT-Lite Bread whip out his latest Experian sheet …
    all oozin’ an’ a drippin’ wit White Privilege)
    “THIS is a Credit Score!”
    (Evra-body sees a 8**+ number – Toll Free, lol)

    (All said like Crocodile Dundee, in the original movie; ya know the scene … “That’s not a knife! …”).

    An’ ta think … one day, some semi-lucky chocolaty-girl will get to rock that with me.
    If she can get past the glarin’, blindin’ whiteness …

    Oh … what was yer post ‘bout again? Oh, yeah … that…
    Who’s “Chingy”? My underwears do that! I don’t want him doin’ that too, ya know?

    PS: You DO Rock Ms. Luvvie! Luv the post. Bestest read 2day.

  7. September 29, 2010 at 3:27 pm

    Poor ting.. My baby cousin could do better marketing than Chingy has goin on right now.. My grandma’s on social security and gets more than Chingy makes in royalties..
    now.THAT’S.SAD.
    but true..

  8. September 29, 2010 at 4:04 pm

    The fact the Antoine Dodson outsold him is just ….

    & the irony of this all is that his album is called “Success & Failure.”

  9. September 30, 2010 at 11:56 am

    Yeah, methinks Chingy’s album is right thurr holding up the Walmart discount CD bin…

  10. bogart4017
    October 13, 2010 at 12:18 pm

    See how easy it is to become irrelevant in this game?

    • October 14, 2010 at 2:27 am

      SUPER easy!

  11. […] I am your people Soulja Boy, and you’re too young for me to write off. Fortunately, you’ve had a break from Kat Stacks since she’s been in prison. Whether she stays or is deported, please stay away for her. And PLEASE don’t pull a Mark Sanford and follow her to South America. And since Celebrity Rehab’s back, take care of that coke habit. And you did mention you wanted to act, I say go Hollywood. Hopefully you’ll have more success than your rap career. If that doesn’t work, you can always crank call Chingy. […]

  12. […] Chingy:  Undersold everybody with a whopping 683 albums. […]

  13. […] it was penned by Kerry Washington or Mo’Nique? I wager it would move about as many units as Chingy’s last album. If you told me ten years ago that the dude who chased Romeo and Bullethead around the school in a […]

  14. January 19, 2011 at 5:58 am

    […] if it was penned by Kerry Washington or Mo’Nique? I wager it would move about as many units as Chingy’s last album. If you told me ten years ago that the dude who chased Romeo and Bullethead around the school in a […]

  15. brandon
    June 20, 2011 at 12:45 am

    let get off chingy back now some of ur fav artist are not doing good in recored sales. i alson see that most of the comment are from women back in the day yall would have been on his dick so stop it if ur not jay z wanye or 50 or m u can hang it up.

  16. […] have hemorrhaged money into labels that went bust, and the last guy to have an album called Jackpot could potentially outsell […]

  17. Noceilings
    July 20, 2011 at 1:12 pm

    He screwed 2 trannies nd got dropped from DTP, his career is long dead

  18. Noceilings
    July 20, 2011 at 1:14 pm

    He screwed 2 trannies nd got dropped from DTP, his career is long dead. I mean like dead since 08-09 ish. He sez hes makin a new album, itll sell maybe 100 copies. Chingy go back to Sidney or whoever the hell you fucked, they got more $ than you lol

  19. […] not sure what is. I mean, on the bright side, she did sell more than Chingy did 2 years ago when he sold 693 albums and went credit score. Yes. She did better than that. Kreay sold 3,900 and went toilet paper. But not the fancy 2-ply. […]