It’s Nigeria’s Birthday. ACT UP!

YESSSSS!!! Nigeria turns 49 today. It’s Africa’s most populated country. And before the intrawebs, we were known more for our oil-rich land than email scams. Negativity aside, I’m proud to be from the heart of Africa. So in honor of the day, I shall start off by singing our national anthem.

*clears throat* Mi mi mi mi miiiiiiiiii
*taps mic*

Ok I’m ready.
Arise, O Compatriots, Nigeria’s call obey To serve our Fatherland With love and strength and faith. The labor of our heroes past Shall never be in vain, To serve with heart and might One nation bound in freedom, peace and unityyyyyyyyyy.

SECKCHUAL CHOKLIT!!!

*crickets*
*drops mic*

Now that I’ve gotten that out the way, I am here to give my fellow Nigerians tips on how to celebrate this joyous day.

*Yell “NAIJA PRIDE” at random intervals throughout the day. In fact, answer your phone with “Naija Pride” instead of “Hello“

*Call someone a “FOOLISH IJOT” or “CLASSLESS WONDAH” if they piss you off

*Tell someone to “SHARRAP” (shut up) if they say something you disagree with

*Eat some rice that’s so spicy, it clears up your sinuses and makes your nose run (trust. My Mama’s Jollof Rice makes me cry. But it’s so delicious)

*Insult someone in your language but use a nice tone so they don’t know

*Listen d-_-b to your favorite Nigerian song and drop down and get yo’ eagle on no matter where you’re at. (*cranks that PSquare, Styl Plus, D’Banj, Shina Peters, Sunny Ade*)

*Take some fufu & stew to work for lunch and when people ask you what it is, roll your eyes and look insulted. Then say “IT IS FOOD! That is all you need to know.”

*Call ur granny in Naija and tell her hello. Oh, and talk EXTRA loud on the phone even though you can hear her clearly Oh, and pop some Bailey’s Irish Cream. You know we can’t have a celebration without Bailey’s.

*reads list* Ok, so I do 90% of this list on any random day. o__O

What are others doing to celebrate the day?

Oh, and of COURSE you must do the Bro Franklin!