Inauguration Ball was a Hoot
I was watching the Neighborhood Inauguration ball, and it was a GOOD TIME, even through the TV. The star power was ridiculous! But y’all know I got some things to say.
The GREAT
*My President has rhythm. Y’all saw him and Shelly (yes, we have given her a nickname) getting down
*Who else was cheesing like a FOOL when Barack started doing the bump with someone? I was expecting him to even start stepping with Michelle (y’all know how us Chicagoans do)
*Michelle Obama is officially a style icon. She can’t do wrong in my book.
*I loves me some Mary J. Blige! Homegirl was fierce with that pixie cut and her dress (simple yet very flattering)
*I’ve come to like Joe Biden. In fact, I shall call him Grandpa Joe from now on.
*Dr. Jill Biden looked STUNNING in that red gown.
*The Obamas and the Bidens are sooo in love. It is awe-spiring to see them interact. Both the first dances had my thug almost on the floor. Just beautiful.
*All the performances were sooo enjoyable!
Honorable mention but not the ball: Y’all KNOW you loved Aunty Re-Re’s (Aretha Franklin) church hat at the actual inauguration. Sister O’Dell is somewhere JEALOUS!! That bow was larger than life (and Re-Re’s mammaries). She came church PROPER!!!
The Bad & The Ugly
*How in the hot heck did Nick Cannon end up DJing it? I was personally offended because I could not figure out why he is even relevant enough to be invited, let alone play a part in it.
**Sigh* Y’all know I love me some Stevie, but I’ll be damned if his hairline doesn’t recess 5 inches every year. It’s like follicular panacea. He got half a mullet left with that shag. It’s like his hair is running away from his fo’head. Po’ thang.
*Why did Sting come in there looking like Paul Bunyan bout the face? He needed a shave BAD. He used to be FINE too but he looked like Peter Griffin in the episode of “Family Guy” where he grew a thick beard that housed a bird’s nest.
*Umm… Ray Romano deserves many boos. He was blander than a rice cake. His jokes were soooo flat! They coulda had Cedric the Entertainer in that piece!
*Why was Mariah Carey such a mess all around? First, I could see her underwear through the dress. Just uncouth. PLUS she sounded horrible. Mimi needs to go find the lining to her dress AND her voice.
*JayZ’s tux was CLEAN and sharp. I was LOVING it. I’m like “YESS he cleaned up well!”. Then I saw his hair and I faltered. His hair was rough! Looked like it was anti-brush. Bruh what happened to getting a lining?
I quit watching the ball after I saw Shakira about to sing so I can’t comment on the rest. Either way, these bads were just fun to talk about. The Ball was mad fun to watch and the pride I had during the whole day was unmatched. I’ve been a grinning fool ALL day!!!
Edit: I just saw Kanye’s haircut. The nappy shag mullet. I’m soooo outdone. My sense and sensibilities are offended. I rebuke Kanye and his hair in the name of common sense. I just… Can’t. I quit him
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10 Comments
*ahem* NOTHING is larger than Re-Re’s mammaries. i’ve heard they have to use a helicopter to get a brassiere on the woman.
All of the above are my sentiments, exactly. Great Post!
“Anti-brush”! LOL! Looks like a black-sheep ass hairhat!!
Did you see Jay Z’s hat at the inauguration? I was afraid.
Yeah. Don’t know what Kanye was doing with the ‘fro combined with Ralph Tresvant’s tail ‘do that he had going. Made me a lil nervous.
Jay is like, “You see my wife. Do I need to cut my hair?”
Ummmm… yes, Jay. You do.
Awesome (and hysterical) ball analysis. Why aren’t you on TV doling this valuable and insightful info to the masses?
I asked somebody if Jay’s wife told him where he was going or if she just sat out his suit.
I. love. you.
AND I must say that even though Mary looked great – she sounded a mess and needs to consider doing something with those unsightly tats. I liked Beyonce’s dress and her performance for the most part (SHUTUP, I KNOW!!!!) but also in part because I could quite clearly see both of her entire areolas and nipples. And po’ Mariah…a sheer velveteen and lace dress to an Inaugural Ball only to mess up your own 15+ year hit…she can’t win. And NICK CANNON on the 1s AND the 2s? Come on, now – I would have been less shocked to see SW1 from “In Living Color.” And I loved seeing Mary and Kerry Washington bawl like babies during the first dance – it was beautiful and Black women will completely stop caring about they makeup when its deep enough, Lawd!
BUT- I. love. you.
I’m so DEAD at LibraSong being able to draw Bey’s breasts from memory! LMAO!
Crownie – BWAHAHAHAA U r SOOOO damn dumb!!1
Nikki – Thanks!
PBG – Gurl that is some steel wool he got as hair
Shannon – Jayz’s hat looked like a dead black squirrel. It was scary @ me too
Robin – We shant speak bout Kanye anymore. He just makes me angry. And yes, beyonce’s fierceness cannot cover up his ridiculous need for a lining and a comb
Nanny – LOL *sigh* Apparently, to do reviews on TV, you must be 85, have had 46 surgeries, and look like a corpse. I fit none of that criteria
Sabrina – She prolly said “sooo… you’re just gonna go like that?” And he said “ummm yeah” and she left it at that
LibraSong – U = my ENTIRE WORLD for that whole comment. I just bout DAHD!!!
K to the – Aint he STOOPID??