An Oriki Tribute to Serena Williams: The Tennis GOAT
Serena Jameka of House Williams First of Her Name. Titan of Tennis. Compton’s Celestial Champion. Wimbledon Wunderkind. GOAT of the Grand Slam. Archetype of Athleticism. Sensational Slayer of Serves. Record-breaking Racket Royalty. Baroness of BAWDY. Olympia’s Olympian Mom. Powerhouse. Icon. Legend. Dope Black woman. The GREATEST of ALL TIME (GOAT). …
Dear Maria Sharapova, You Should Release a Song Called Mad and Mediocre
Maria Sharapova is releasing a memoir titled Unstoppable and excerpts of the book came out. She fixes her mouth (and hands) to talk about Serena Williams in the book, and I just need to write her a letter because Maria got life all the way wrong, so she’s earned this …
Serena Williams is All Of Us. If We Got Superpowers.
You know what I don’t have time for? Serena Williams and her perpetual showing that some of us are just mere mortals while she’s a citizen of Mount Olympus. Actually, lemme quit lying. I GOT ALL THE TIME FOR IT. That woman is extraordinary. Sheesh. Yesterday, we found out that …
Dear Serena Williams, So You’re Just Gonna Be This Flawless Effortlessly? Ok.
Serena. I SAY, SERENA. GIRL STAHP. Why did you just do this to all of us? Your New York Magazine cover and editorial is the reason people write songs and poems and whatnots. I wanna pen some haikus and limericks in your honor because GAHTDAMB. I bet Common used one …
Serena Williams’ Ass is My Patronus
Serena Williams’ ass is my spirit animal patronus (changed because the term “spirit animal appropriates Native American culture). I have said it once and I will say it again. Seriously. As one who wasn’t blessed with a lot of junk in her trunk, I do have ass envy. Remember the …