About the Heartbreak of America’s Choice
I forced myself to go to sleep around 1am. I wanted to keep hope, even for 5 more hours. I can usually find bright spots in situations. There are none for me here. I feel doomed.
I wanted to wake up this morning celebrating the first woman president. Instead, I wake up with strong confirmation that the country I pledge allegiance to doesn’t care about me, or anyone who isn’t a straight white man. And that America would do anything to protect white supremacy, including electing a man who the KKK endorsed.
I am heartbroken for where we just found ourselves. 8 years of having a Black president and the U.S. lost its complete mind and the racists got fresh air and here they are. Repping hard. I am heartbroken because I don’t know what to do next. So I’ll just write.
And cuss a lot. Because: FUCK EVERYTHING.
And honestly, I’m heartbroken for Hillary Clinton. Because you can spend 30 years working in public service, you can change your stances and say you’ve made mistakes you want to atone for. And you can be the picture of grace even as an Orangutan in a wig yells at you. AND YOU CAN WIN THE POPULAR VOTE (she won by 200,000 votes). But you can still lose the race you have spent your life preparing for. It happens to be to a troll who will be the first EVER president of the U.S. who has no government or military experience and who was a reality TV star. I feel for her. I feel deeply for her.
That Hillary Clinton lost this election is a stunning loss. But we learned of the demographics of those who voted against her, and I am even more shocked. 53% of white women voted for Donald Trump. Now sit here and point fingers at Black people for this result. Beauty and the Beast face asses. Stockholm Syndrome having gallivanting goats.
Nothing is as determined as a desperate white man who feels like he’s losing his position in the web of oppression he created. But nothing is sadder than the woman who has bought in to her own subjugation.
This proved that white women are swimming so deep in the pool of internalized patriarchy that they’d rather vote for a rapist than another woman “they don’t trust.”
I mean. Wow. Who taught you to hate yourselves?? As folks rah-rahed about pantsuits, your friends and neighbors stepped into the voting booth and cast their vote for the opponent, who has constantly denigrated women and done all he could to disrespect us.
As folks put stickers on the grave of Susan B. Anthony, thanking her for their right to vote, their sisters and aunties marked their ballot in support of a man who gave Howard Stein permission to call his daughter Ivanka “a nice piece of ass.”
Self-hate is a bitch, ain’t it?
Black women? Well we showed the fuck up and did what was right. We always do. So this is not on us. The spirit of Ida B. Wells taught us better. We voted without the protection of the Voting Right Acts. We showed up.
I have very few kind things to say right now, and I am enraged and I AM in the space where I want to point fingers. This is a collective fail.
First, those who refused to vote because “my votes don’t matter.” DO BETTER. There were states where HRC lost by less than 1,000 votes.
To the 3rd party voters who insisted on “voting their conscience” in spite of what doing that could mean in a REAL way when their candidates had no chance to win. Like the folks in Florida, who knew that them voting for Gary Johnson or Jill Stein could be the decider of who the electoral college’s votes go to.
I’m just really ready to shave Florida off the Union
I resent these people because YOU have common sense and you are logical human beings. Yet you are “standing on principles.” All to prove what point?
To the COWARDS all around us who secretly supported a demagogue and came out in droves. 53% of white women voted for Donald Trump. 53%. These aren’t women who are uneducated either. And to the cowards who run the GOP who couldn’t know integrity if it slapped them in the face. This man has been spurred forward by people who had the power to stop him but didn’t find the courage.
And I know people are trying to find ways to be comforting but saying “we have lived through worse” isn’t helping either. Because the last time Republicans controlled the White House, Senate AND House was 1928. You know what happened the year after? The Great Depression. The moment Trump took a lead in the Electoral College, the Dow Jones dropped 800 points. The last time this trifling trifecta happened, Jim Crow was alive and well. WE haven’t lived through worse. Our ancestors did and TRUST they would not have wanted us to live through it again and they died fighting so we wouldn’t have to.
Everything President Barack Obama worked for will be reversed. A Republican president who is Hitler 2.0, backed by a Republican majority Congress who might have the power to appoint up to 3 Supreme Court justices.
That is A LOT of power that even George W. Bush did not have, in all his hapless glory. Do you understand how deep this ditch we just dug is? President Obama spent 8 years digging us out the 25 foot ditch that Bush left us in. And Bush was a better person than Trump could ever be. HOW DEEP IS THIS DITCH WE’RE ABOUT TO BE DUG INTO?
CHRIS CHRISTIE IS ABOUT TO BE IN THE CABINET. RUDY FUCKING GUILIANI MIGHT BE ATTORNEY GENERAL. FUCK. David Duke (who ran the KKK) is about to be an advisor to the President of the United States. I’ll be here, freaking the fuck out.
But that’s exactly what folks wanted. Let’s be CLEAR AS ICE. White people, this is YOUR embarrassment to shoulder. This loss? Those are your cousins, uncles, friends, who turned out in record numbers to make sure that their voice was heard in those booths. Those people you will see during the holidays in a few weeks.
I have NO LOVE for those who consider themselves “good people” but stand idly by as the world crumbles around them. It’s not enough to PERSONALLY not do damage. If you’re present as someone else destroys what’s around you and you do nothing, you helped them. And there’s a bunch of do-nothing ass white folks sitting around today stunned. Everyone lets themselves off the hook by saying “Well it wasn’t ME who did it.” BUT YOU WERE THERE. What did you do to stop it?!? You sleep better at night knowing it wasn’t YOU who made those racist/homophobic/islamophobic jokes. But you were there when they happened.
Donald Trump and his ascent to power is a direct result of white fragility, white male mediocrity flourishing (privilege) and desperation. He was elevated because y’all were in your feelings about a Black man running this country for 8 years. And he did a damb good job with it, even as Congress tried to obstruct each and every decision. You get a representative (Trump) who represents everything Obama doesn’t. You force a demagogue down our throats.
We all read our history books and marveled at HOW Hitler was allowed to do what he did in Germany. Still wondering?!? Right. The man has threatened to build a wall to keep Mexicans out, and ban Muslims AND SEXUALLY ASSAULT women. That man won the Presidency. 59 million people hailed his message as right.
So yeah. I’ll be over here heartbroken and at a true loss on what we can do to keep our country from crumbling into the Hunger Games. And those of you talmbout “well I’ll just move.” WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU GOING? Canada doesn’t want you and moving is expensive. IS YOUR PASSPORT EVEN VALID?!? Where are you going? Do you think anywhere will be safe for you? White supremacy’s grubby hands are all over the globe.
We will sit here and deal with the fallout TOGETHER. Because what happened on November 8, 2016, will have far-reaching consequences for all of us for decades to come. The world was scared for us, because the man with the nuclear codes is one who is a Twitter ho. 140-characters could have him starting a war. BUT HERE WE ARE.
The day I was petrified of is here. I was hoping none of us would ever have to volunteer as tribute.
P.S. Sooo y’all wanna start planning the BLAXIT or nah?
America, I’m Judging You. I didn’t think you’d be helping me write part 2 of my book so soon. But here we are. On the dawn of a new day.
Get these blogposts directly in your inbox! Sign up for my weekly LuvvLetter below:
It is time to write that book. Come into The Book Academy and learn how to go from IDEA to INK.
Related Posts
153 Comments
I’m right there with you Luvvie. I went to bed early and just hoped that I would wake up to something good. My husband woke me up around 3am and said it looks like he won.. it’s over baby. My heart just sunk and to read the breakdown of the demographics I couldn’t do anything but shake my head and curse. Right now I don’t know what to do, it’s like I’m walking around in a daze. Racism won last night.
WE haven’t lived through worse. Our ancestors did and TRUST they would not have wanted us to live through it again.
That right there. ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL of that.
yes yes yes. 🙁
So true!!!
Thank God you were able to put your feelings and thoughts into words, because words fail me now. I’m in stunned silence. Be our voice!
Thank you so much for this. As I alternate between anger and despair, I can’t find the words to say how I am feeling. But you have summed it up perfectly. As a woman of color, I really overestimated my value to this country.
“As a woman of color, I really overestimated my value to this country.” This comment slays me. I am so, so sorry. You are loved and you are valued. I’m seeking out every marginalized group I can today (and tomorrow and the next day and on) to spread love. The power lies with the people, not with one leader. I believe love will win in the end, but I wish we didn’t have to go through so much pain before we get there. I can’t pretend to understand that part. May we all show love and feel loved today.
I am a white woman and I voted for her. And I am beyond devastated today.
Same here. And the worst is we (white women) as a group were STUPID enough to marginalize ourselves. The WOC had the sense to recognize their value and stand up and vote against this nonsense. The fact that a majority of white women voted for that misogynist makes me want to vomit.
Me too, stunned, ashamed…
Me too. I’m horrified that Trump won. I yelled, and swore, and cried last night and then got up this morning and got busy. ACLU (renewed my membership and donated again), Planned Parenthood, RAINN.org, National Partnership for Women and Families, and EFF.org all got money from me today and will every month – as well as my time and energy. We have so much work to do. I’m still with her.
Bright spot Obama till January.Hopefully he will be able to keep some laws of sanity before “the Cheeto and his Flying Monkeys ” take over the White house . I got a FB post from a now ex- friend who lives in Florida , happy that marijuana is now legal. I answered ” the way you all voted it seemed like it already was” then I blocked her dumb ass!
I’ve been wondering what all my weedheads nationwide are gonna do with Guiliani as AG? Last I looked Federal law Trumps (intended) State law.
Same here. And when I told my children (4 of the 5 will be able to vote in 2020) the election results, the first thing out of the mouth of my 15-year old was “We will all be old enough to FIX THIS by the next election.” Let it be so. Amen.
As a white woman, I cannot fathom why ANY woman would have cast a vote for him and yet, two (plus, likely) members of my family did. Jesus. Thanks Luvvie for speaking the outrage we are feeling and I’ll be goddamned if I let Trump take us all to hell on a short bus.
(And I so feel for Hillary Clinton because damn, what a blow that must be for all the reasons you mention. I can’t imagine how she’s feeling today.)
I slept between 9:30 p.m. and 12:30 a.m. and then there was no more sleeping for me. Only lots of tossing and turning and having my intestines rebel against what white people have done to this country. It makes me incredibly ashamed that there is no reason a person of color should look at me and believe I’m not part of that 53% of white women. Guess my only option is to prove it through action.
“Black women? Well we showed the fuck up and did what was right. We always do. So this is not on us. The spirit of Ida B. Wells taught us better.”
Oh Luvvie – my thoughts EXACTLY, as I wore my Wells sweatshirt to my polling place yesterday.
But that aside – I’m faced with several realizations today. Despite my optimism, I retained the awareness of what America really feels for me as a black woman, and what they feel for my two sons. In all of this, I’m most worried about the reality that my two young men, hated, feared and consistently dissed by this country – also have the added danger of becoming pawns…Specifically, soldiers, drafted in a dangerous, apocalyptic nuclear war started by President-Elect Cinnamon Hitler.
At the very least, now is not the time to shirk away from this reality, or simply be one of the many who sits and complains about it. We are not without power….It’s just a matter of determining, as a collective, how to harness that power so that we are no longer dismissed.
Hate won last night and I am literally speechless because it makes absolutely no sense too me. The KKK are marching in full regalia on a bridge in NC and this Vile Man does not have a clue!! Just WOW SMH!!!
You are so eloquent with your words, writing everything I’m feeling right now. I’m full of shock, rage, and despair. I just want to send Hillary flowers; she shouldn’t have had to endure this defeat. Sigh.
I laid in bed for about an hour and a half and just cried. That’s all I could do. Cry. I have to go to work today, smile, be helpful and nice to people that don’t give a damb about me. Me, as in the black woman from NYC, living in VAB is. I know of at least 4 people at my job that voted for Cheetoface, I have to work with them today. And because I can’t add to an already hostile work environment, I’ll have to be civil. As far as I’m concerned they want me dead. Anyone who voted for him wants me and anyone not melanin deficient, dead. Period. And to that I say… Fuck Yall.
Right on point Diva….it’s a hard thing to have to look at the supporters and still pretend helpfulness and civility….have a few in my office space as well…What I really WANT to is walk around slapping every person that I suspect voted wrong…but alas, that would be spreading more hate…and we can’t hate people who hate people to teach people that hating is wrong…
The only reason people aren’t saying what in their hearts here @ Talk Behind your Back, undercover Racist, & Two Faced LLC, is because it go against the companies Violence -Free Workplace, Harassment – Free Environment policy.
I’m so numb right now, alternating between despair and defiant anger.
And frightened. Even GWB with all his foolishness had enough sense not to GO THERE with the nuclear codes, but out of the box Sir Ferrethead is like why do we have them if we can’t use them? You have the power to end the planet at your fingertips and you’re all cavalier about it? People are like we can fix this in 4 years, but you’re assuming we’ll still be here.
This country needs serious prayer.
I am physically sick right now. Like laying in bed with Aleve and nausea medication by my side. This is the worse of America and I’m raising my sweet, loving, amazing, black sons in this shit!!!
Though I am not physically ill, I share your sentiments and those of all the other ladies here in the comments. As a black woman who also works in corporate America, this is a lot to digest. If I wasn’t already sad enough from the results, I witnessed my son fall to his knees and cover his face when his father and I told him who won this morning. He is only 9 years old.
I am a black woman, living in the Caribbean and I feel as though there is a pall of despair in the air. President Obama won a Nobel Peace Prize, President-Elect Trump has the whole world on eggshells. I have family in the USA, legal citizens, who are worried because they are women, black and immigrants.
Hitler 2.0. I am fearful for what the next four years will bring.
This part right’chea: Stockholm Syndrome having gallivanting goats. Can button is broke today. I’d say check tomorrow, but it ain’t looking good… #numb…Danielle Moodie-Mills said it plain: “This is literally white supremacy’s last stand in America,” she said. “This is it. This is what it looks like.” #wintertrulyiscoming
“Can button is broken today”
This right here ^
Thank you! Definitely stealing that line.
I am embarrassed to be an older white woman today because I had EVERY hope this country would not lose it’s ever-loving mind and vote in that disgusting man. I am also beyond devastated today. The world looks bleak today and I don’t know how it will look better tomorrow.
This exactly. It is a heartbreaking embarrassment. I was so excited yesterday to have my kids in the bikth as we voted for her. What the Hell am I supposed to teach my children from here?! Where is the teaching moment other than “Sorry, your fellow white people were ignorant and scared and decided that a reality star would be a good change for our nation. Good luck with that bullshit.”
And to the white women going “but I voted for her” please shut up. When people are scared and hurting, the wrong response is to blurt out “it wasn’t ME that hurt you!” How the f*ck does that help anyone? Have a seat.
Thank You!
Maybe it is just a way of saying we all need to see each other as individuals who have our own story – I think this can help break down the divides of thinking I know something about someone just by what they look like.
Taking my seat.
…or maybe it is just white fragility.
Very sorry for all of my fellow citizens that this election creates such a hostile and frightening atmosphere. Horrifying to know that half of the voting population endorses Trump’s racist, xenophobic, misogynistic vision. Some of them are my neighbors, the people I encounter every day. Terrifying when I consider the nation’s history of violence and subjugation. I have to shake off the utter despair and continue the battle. Never giving up.
Dara Ballance I am a Black woman who is insulted by your response to the White women who empathize with us. Thi sis what is wrong with us as a race. We say fuck them if they didn’t and fuck them when they do. People scared and hurting is for the future of this country and our communities. Beginning to marginalize the few support we have as women, is the biggest mistake. Not because we are Black, but becaues we are women, that is the common thread that binds us. Sadly not the common thread for all of us, but that is something we as a race and gender have to work on. So this type of comment, even though you are entitled to it, is apart of the problem. We can do better.
You’re response is spot on!! I couldn’t have said it better so Thank You!
Thank you so much for saying this. I read the comment yesterday and was so hurt by it–not mad, just…stung. I sat down and typed up a full response, then decided I really didn’t want to send the wrong message by posting it. I also was scared and hurting after the election results because Trump marginalizes not just POC but all women. Not that I can speak for all of us, but I think that most of us white women who regularly read Luvvie do so because we empathize with POC and want to learn more about their perspective (and Luvvie and her commenters are just damn funny). I know I will never understand all the things black women have to go through, but I try to whatever extent possible and I SO want to support you all in your journeys. Thank you being open to us trying to offer support!
Thank you. White people centering their feelings is what got us into this holy hell.
You’re welcome. No. These are the things that got us into this hell you talk about: Our Black race and minorities who had the opportunity to vote and did not exercise that right; People who are not using their sense of common rational or intelligence; People voting on emotions rather than policies, reforms, and realistic short & long term changes; people not really knowing the facts and buying into racism, gender/racial/class bias and prejudice; and finally, the uneducated older white males.
I think many of those white women who DID vote for Hillary are scared, too. Yes, this is an extremely frightening time for all of us (People of Color) and for immigrants, disabled, etc. But think about it: The white women (who may be ‘fragile’ in the stereotypical sense) who are saying they voted for Hillary have a double reason to fear. A man who BRAGGED ABOUT SEXUALLY ASSUALTING WOMEN was elected to the presidency. All women regardless of race should be afraid. Just like having a Black man as POTUS made racists feel they can come out the KKKloset and be openly hostile, the same is happening already with men who feel they can abuse women openly because “one of their own” was elected.
Add to that the fact that the white women who worked hard and Voted for Hillary – in a serious way – now have no allies. Their racist families are angry that they didn’t vote for Orange Hitler, Hillary didn’t win so their compatriots are lonely islands, and now most women & men of color are looking at them sideways because we don’t trust them. So for that reason, I won’t cast aside my ivory sisters who did vote correctly even as I side eye them just in case. Trust has to be earned through action. ijs
Yes, I am a White woman, and I am appalled and shocked, but unfortunately not surprised. What I am a little surprised at is how many White women voted for this. I mean, fuck that. Idiots. Self-hating psychosis. I honor your anger. I can’t say that I even begin to get it, but I see it. I’m going to spend today wailing and wallowing, and then I’m going to get busy. Enough. And I’m not moving anywhere. This is my country and I’m not going to let it get hijacked by a bunch of fools.
I’m deeply embarrassed and saddened by what’s happened. I’m white. I voted for Hillary. All my family voted for her that could vote. I had some relatives who voted third party because while they claimed the media lies about everything, they chose to believe the lies about one person and ignore the lies about another. This upsets me greatly. My daughters are heartbroken.
But you know what? This doesn’t mean this country has not progressed. It has progressed. It just has not progressed enough. Not as much as we had hoped and thought it did. Not as much as it needs to.We all need to get up, dust ourselves off, and keep fighting. He may have won the presidency, but losing the popular vote means he has no mandate. He will not get re-elected in four years without that mandate. He also has a deeply divided party which isn’t going to help him. Let’s all work like hell to make sure he only has one term.
Agreed!!!
I feel so bad for RHC because of everything you said. I know some people (especially Repubs who are trying to rub it in her face) are calling her out for not speaking publicly last night, but I don’t blame her. I don’t think I would want to either.
Let’s hope that everything doesn’t actually fall to shit as we fear it might. Although I am kind of tired of hearing that “there’s nothing to fear!” Well, this non-white person is a little scared. Especially for my children.
I can’t even cry. I’m so stunned. My eyes flutter and become engulfed but nothing falls. A godless nation is a fearsome thing to behold. Lord.
I stood in front of my beautiful diverse college students this morning and apologized for not doing better. The old racists won. AGAIN. And the young craven fools followed. I’m so ashamed of every single white person in this country, except maybe Hilary, who did her damnedest.
I am a white woman in a white suburb of a very segregated Chicago. I also feel like there is no place for me. I underestimated the hate and greed in this world. I am inconsolable at the moment, but I will still try to be strong and have hope for the future. Thank you for you for your voice, Luvvie. Love to you all.
Oh Luuvie you are right.! I am a white woman who is having to fight the urge to punch 6 white women in the trachea in every group of 10 white women I see! I would like to start with any of them who post bs about abortions or enter their daughters in beauty pageants. Bearing false witness and objectifying women is not Christian. And if you live in a gated community, this was not about the economics of “forgotten Americans” it is about racism.
this right here is EVERYTHING……I love you….and laughed so hard I am crying
I couldn’t sleep last night once it became apparent that Cheeto Satan won! The majority of White people voted in favor of hate and now hate controls the White House, the Senate and Congress. I am an eternal optimist but I think this is the beginning of the end for America. Before I went to bed, I made sure to locate my passport.
You said everything everyone is feeling.
Canadians over here sayin “I’m Canadian it doesn’t effect me” YES IT FUCKING DOES!! IT effects EVERYONE.
I honestly don’t know what else to say, I’m at a total loss.
You could not have said it better.
To me 8 years with Trump and sure the whites will vote Black again the way Bush made them do it for Obama.
Am scared to shit for the next 8 years, its still surreal. I don’t want to be the one that has to say I said it to all the people I know that voted Trump.
Like I have been asking since he doesn’t pay TAx can I decide not to pay mine next year and see how he runs the fucking country. Providing government benefit to the fucking red necks in the rural areas that voted for him.
Let me just shut up right now cause am a fucking immigrant and not read to go home yet, since mexico will be having a wall next year cannot even run there either.
Hopefully, it will only be 4 years.
It is NOT going to be 8 years. It may not even be 4.
but if it is less than 4, regardless of the reason, then we have Pence.
I agree 100% with everything you said. I am a white woman, and as a white woman I am ashamed that such a large percentage of white women voted against themselves. Against us women collectively. And believe me, I’ve been snapping back and forth with my cousins and their bullshit on Facebook…
What I can’t stand the most is all of the people who clearly voted Trump and their pre-election “lesser of two evils” reasoning. Like, HOW IS HE LESS EVIL!?!? He blatantly and unapologetically lies and is racist and is sexist, and that is okay.
A woman who has worked so hard for so long, has the experience, and may not be perfect but has the best interest of ALL Americans at heart – she is evil?!
Don’t come at me with that bullshit. I can not believe what has happened. I’m so beside myself, I was Team No Sleep last night.
God help us.
Right there with you ! This white Southern woman is absolutely dumbfounded. My reponse to any and all excuses why any woman, POC, other minority, disabled or other person (other than those dudes with the Rebel flag on their trucks) voted for this POS is this: balderdash; gutter rubbish, hogwash, claptrap and poppycock. I simply can not get over it.
I am thoroughly ashamed of my heritage.
There will be a lot of red wine going down in the next few weeks. Just sayin’
Thank you for putting this into words. Thank you for all of your words.
I watched this all unfold all the way from Jamaica. I knew it would happen. I was not shocked. I knew that the masses would reject Hillary not because of whatever crimes she might have committed, but simply because she’s a woman. I knew that Dump Truck would win, because I have seen firsthand how a “leader” with no sense can rally the masses. I knew this would happen, but a part of me was hoping, praying that I’d wake up today and find out I was wrong. I don’t even have any words of comfort to offer right now. I only know of the struggles from outside, so I can’t relate directly. I just encourage you and everyone who wants to keep hope alive to keep doing your parts to fight the good fight. But you all must be so tired. Why should you have to fight just to be able to breathe? Why? I’m sad and angry and crushed for you all. I feel your pain in my spirit.
And Hillary. Sigh… She is not my favourite person, but I’d have supported her. I can’t imagine how she’s feeling right now. I don’t know how she made it through last night. After all she has been through, to get another blow like this… I don’t know what I’d do. I feel so bad for her.
Just do your best to stay safe and alive out there, my people. Just stay alive.
I just feel sick today, and I’m not even American. I don’t think you could have made a worse choice. You can come to Canada if you want but we don’t behave in the same disgusting racist misogynistic fashion up here so don’t bring your garbage with you.
I fear his presidency will affect us in Canada as well to some degree.
And our immigration website “coincidentally” crashed last night….twice. ????
I CANNOT with us white people today.
As an African American woman, this historic loss to this very flawed bigot, proved that we don’t truly have a place in this country. But it’s the only home my ancestors and family have ever known. In approximately 2 weeks we will be celebrating Thanksgiving, but I have never been big on any of these man-made holidays, I don’t plan to celebrate any of them from today going forward. I am thankful 365 days and every leap year, but these so called special days only celebrate the death of others in my view. I don’t have any enemies outside of the United States. The election of Trump showed me that the enemy can live next door, work beside me as a coworker and pretend to be a friend. I will continue to enjoy those man-made holidays by relaxing at home. I will raise my children to do the same. To hell with the flag, national anthem and anything red white or blue. I am absolutely done. Peace
Women who look like me betrayed us all. Sickening. I want to vomit. Saying “We’re with you” a million times won’t change that fact. I’m so sorry.
Thank you for writing this. I always appreciate your words more than you know. I can’t do anything today but grieve, so I respect the hell out of someone who can get the words out.
Tomorrow, though, I #riseup.
And if you think we won’t be dealing with this man for the next 8 years, you are sadly mistaken.
The Dems don’t have any one else they can put up. That’s why Hillary was there. If they had one viable candidate, they would have coalesced behind that person. They did in 2008 with Barack Obama. People have known for a long time HRC was not electable. She has a likeability problem. Sad to say it, but elections from President to Homecoming Queen are pretty much the same – a popularity contest.
Name someone that can win in 4 years.
The party better start banging the drum for them NOW! Come thru Sen. Cory Booker (although I don’t think this same ‘Murica is going to turn the reins over to another Black man any time soon)! Come thru Sen. Kamala Harris! Come thru Gov. Cuomo (old NY political name + ties to the Kennedys)! Come thru Sen. Tammy Duckworth and Sen. Kirsten Gillebrand. And Sen. Tim Kaine (I ain’t forgot about you and your bilingual swag! You tried.)
We have got to start voting in the other election years because those determine who will be eligible to run on a presidential ticket.
I’m sad. I’m mad. But even worse for the other side, I’m energized.
This is the meat of the matter. Who will be ready enough to go against him in four years’ time? Because rest assured, he will want his two terms. And even if America is looking like the aftermath of a firebomb, rest assured mediocre white people will not hesitate to give it to him.
All the jokes about him running, the roasts at the White House Correspondents Dinner. Welp, the joke’s on them now, isn’t it?
Yes, yes, yes to all of this. We need to start looking now at who can run for 2020. We need to get organized and in two years shove a dem house and Senate so far up his ass he won’t be able to sneeze without getting it passed by them. We need aid and assistance from allies. And Elizabeth Warren would be a good addition to your list.
First thing:2018 and build our troops in Congress and the State Houses.
Second thing: Show UP to Vote in 2018
Third thing: 2020 is a damn census year, which determines who is in power in the state houses to redistrict the Congressional and State representative districts in every damn state. Texas stands to gain a seat or two, and they might as well be Democratic ones.
FYI, Obama will b working with Eric Holder regarding redistricting to take it back to court. So keep your eyes open for participating.
White woman here who couldn’t agree with you more, and is also reeling today.
Blaxit. Yassssss!!!! When? Where? I travel light. Lesgo. NOW, before the rest of the proverbial shitstorm hits the proverbial turbine.
Was it just me or did any one else want to pluck out oma stupid Rosa’s eyes out and drag her off the stage
THIS!!! Allllllll of this!!! Thank you for putting words to my thoughts (and validating them in the process). Today I left my house literally afraid for the lives of myself all of my black and brown friends, family and peers. The new freedom that this fool has given to his big-ass basket of deplorables is frightening. Our blood is on the hands of all of the idiots who “voted their conscience” or “voted the bible” because someone getting an abortion THAT DOESN’T CONCERN YOU is worth sending the entire country to hell apparently AND on the hands of the “but I don’t trust her” OH, BUT YOU TRUST HIM?!?!?! iCan’t….#EpicFail
But where we gonna Blaxit to?
Was wondering that myself
FATHER GAWD!!! What in hell are we going to do now? I called off today because all I can do is lay in bed and let my mind race. Lord help us!!!
Whew, Lord I’m in such shock, despair and turmoil right now. Who would have thought HRC would lose this election?
Nobody. So how did every single POLL get it so wrong? They said the AA vote was down from 2008 & 2012, ok but we represented. They (meaning POLLS) said the Latino vote should swing in HRC’s favor in FL. They counted for 29% of the FL vote. Supposedly, educated Whites would gravitate towards HRC. They said…then there I was last night watching those states come in and the numbers weren’t adding up. There were some serious closet Trumpsters out there. The Latinos that voted Trump…ummm OK, hope your papers are straight. The AAs that voted for him…you’re idiots. Whites, I think most liked his message (scared to admit it) but didn’t vocalize it.. but didn’t it show last night. Damn, just damn. HRC, girl I’m so sorry we tried and I truly think you would have made an awesome Madame President. Done. Apparently, I’ll be DONE for the next 4 years. Joe Biden…get in gear, we’ll need you. Oh and I can’t Blaxit, where am I supposed to go? No, where would WE go, this is our home, our parents, grandparents and most great grandparents’ home. Pray.
You have hit the nail on the head. Internalized patriarchy and self loathing of white women just fucked us all. As a white woman I am horrified and devastated. Thank you for your voice, it just may save me.
I’m walking around my Oklahoma neighborhood giving err’body the side-eye, because NOW I know what they think. A boorish, petty, dangerous, narcissist is going to run their shit into the ground, and I AM HERE FOR IT.
*also: Fuck you very much, non-voting-protest-voting-ass people. Because you did this.
Luvvie,
Thank you for being you! I am ill today by what has occurred, for once I have nothing to say. Please continue to use your voice!
I just discovered your blog a few days ago and am glad to be able to participate. I, too, am a white woman who voted for Hillary and who has rejoiced in every day of President Obama’s presidency. I’m 77 years old and can’t help but see the election of Trump as akin to the election of Nixon, an equally frightening event. I always like to think that we can weather any storm, but that doesn’t take into account the damage that each storm leaves in its wake. How to proceed is the challenge right now.
The women who voted for Trump make me think of women who stay in abusive relationships. I still don’t quite understand it.
Keep up your good work!
Hey Rosalie,
Interesting that you mentioned Nixon….I was born around the time he resigned. However, I have been thinking about the potential parallels to Trump, based on what I know of history. If you don’t mind sharing, what was that experience like to have Nixon as the POTUS?
Well if the bastard had not been so damn paranoid about losing and sucked another 4 years out of that war, things might not have been so bad. Nixon gave us EPA, OSHA, he wanted a National Health Plan. However he lacked the confidence that he could win re-election without resorting to some underground tactics. If he had just left that alone, he might not have ended up as he did. I despised him but during the Bush43 days found myself missing him . My mother would slap me into next month if she heard me say that.
To quote Al Giordano:
“The election of Trump will mark the exact moment of failure of manhood in America. The only possible new leadership will have to come from women, especially women of color, who already live in Trump’s America and have more experience navigating such a world, far more than we guys can learn in the short time we’ll have to build an authentic resistance. Mexican-American and Muslim-American women will be the first hit and instead of letting the dudebro aspirants set the tone it will be up to all of us to follow those women into battle instead.”
I am a white woman, but I am terrified. I know I am one of millions who is desperately wondering how we fight back from this.
Luvvie, I take some comfort in knowing how strong you are and pray that you will be one of the leaders that will help show us the way forward. I know that’s a huge burden. I’m sorry for that. But I humbly beg that you allow all of us, regardless of race, to follow your lead. We are lost. Show us how to fight this battle. Your words mean more than you know.
This. Luvvie — I admire your mind and your writing, and your heart, very much. Your assessment pains me — that white women are to blame for this. I can see it as part of the reality, and it makes my heart hurt even more than the election outcome. I hope all women can figure out how to get past blame and back to the work we came here to do. I know you are already at it. Thank you.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for continuing to write because right now I just want to scream, cry and break things. Couldn’t stop crying last night and still at it off and on today. But by the grace of God we got up today so as long as there is breath in our lungs we can take action. My mind still isn’t right so I don’t have a firm plan but I’m working on my list of action items like researching what Republican senators/reps are up for reelection and when? We have to get them out. If we are going to survive this we are going to have to work. We need leadership and we need to organize. I for one have to admit that I’ve been on auto pilot when it comes to being more informed and active but last night this country made my baby girl cry. She cried because she is scared and doesn’t understand how this could happen. They shouldn’t have made my baby girl cry!
I am a white woman, my family rejoiced when President Obama and his family moved into the White House. We love them and admire and respect them tremendously.
Yesterday’s election of that monster was a blight, an atrocity!
Utter devastation.
I am embarrassed to be a white woman aged 45-64.
PLEASE remember that 39% of us did NOT vote for Trump or his vision when you see an older white woman on the street.
The road is long…not giving up on a better America –
Really? In all of our pain and fear, your main thought was to ask us to think about the poor, poor, older white women? To hell with all of you.
Definitely not my main thought…would love to have a real conversation with you.
““Black women? Well we showed the fuck up and did what was right. We always do. So this is not on us.”
I know I did. But SOMEBODY didn’t (looking at you too, MEN).
In 2012, President Obama got 93% of the black vote. Last night, Hillary only received 88%. Somebody was sitting home and drinking the kool-aid.
Thank you for this brutal truth. It is heartbreaking to see so much racism and sexism brought into the light. I can only hope that we can move forward and help people understand that their anger is misdirected. This racial separation and infighting has been orchestrated by the very corporate entities who are the real ones draining their pockets.
Just a quick correction – The last time we had a Republican president, house, and senate was just a few years ago, from 2002-2006, across Dubya’s two terms. I remember being totally crushed and separated from my country at that 2004 Dubya re-election as well. This, though, is another level.
This here white woman is embarrassed and ashamed of that 53%. It boggles my mind. I volunteered. I registered voters. I donated money. I made GOTV calls. I voted. I educated my two now-terrified teenage children about the obligation they have to their brothers and sisters of every color and religion. I reminded them this morning that their whiteness and their socioeconomic class means they will not feel the worst. That as gutted as we all may feel today, our obligation, our duty, is to stand with and protect those who will feel it more. Today we grieve. Tomorrow we work.
America and your so called “Christians”,“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs, which outwardly appear beautiful, but within are full of dead people’s bones and all uncleanness (Matthew 23:27). Save your breath; your actions speak so loudly I cannot hear what you are saying. Done with the whole lot——liars and hypocrites!
America is consumed with symbolism but not reality; pithy, prideful sayings but not truth. Virtual “greatness” has blinded the weak to what real greatness demands. But those who voted for him will soon discover the depths of their folly; unfortunately, everyone else is already aware. They have been given permission to remove their hoods and be proud, open bigots and racists. Tell ’em to come get Rachel and Weezy.
Our beloved Luvvie, you are wondrous, and such a gift to us, especially now.
I can’t even describe my feelings trying to digest the aftermath of this election. Today, I get to hunker down, be gentle with myself, eat comfort food, and light soul-soothing candles.
But tomorrow, my fellow Capricorn, I’ll remember that we are at our best in a crisis.
It’ll be time once more to do something I know I do well… gently encourage those I meet, and pour more light and love out into the world. We have “good work” to do. That is why we are here, and, we will get the “good work” that we have been put here to do, done, of that I have never been more certain, or more sure.
Just let me know what pack and when to be there…..
So many tears. So much anger. And disappointment. And disbelief. And anger again, because I was naive enough to believe people weren’t that hateful.
I feel your devastation! I’m an educated, white woman and voted for HER. I’m just so sad today. I cried myself to sleep last night and sobbed my way through my morning. Seeing a republican lead congress, White House and Supreme Court justices has me feeling seriously ILL. How can we go from someone with integrity to someone so awful? I don’t understand and am so fearful of what is to come. It feels like a part of me, the part of me that is proud of my country, died last night. WTF did we just do??? And knowing loved ones that voted for him makes it even worse. I just can’t….
Oh, something I forgot to say….
…picking up on something you’ve said, elsewhere…yes, can people please leave Michelle the Magnificent out of this, with asking her to run in 2020!! To that, a billion times NO!!
She has done more than enough, and deserves time away from the fray to enjoy and relish as she sees fit.
Right….back to eating too much lasagne and lighting more candles….
THIS! ALL DAY LONG!
I’m sorry. I will do better as a white woman to step up to other white women who say and do the wrong thing. I will stand by those who are ‘othered’. I will recognise my privilege. I’m a US and UK citizen living in London and I’m saddened by both Brexit and the Orange Cheeto. I will fight the war on both sides.
[…] This Week (Last Night) I Learned: Volume 61 (Brenna Clarke Gray’s TinyLetter) “While the people who terrorize my Twitter feed like to mock ‘safe spaces’ and ‘triggering,’ it is they who live a life of abject, constant fear. How else do you explain the earnest belief in conspiracy theories, the desperation to be constantly armed, the vitriol at anyone who seems to want to make them share their pie?” Stay | Stirrup Queens Magpie Musing: Fighting for What’s Right is Worth It About the Heartbreak of America’s Choice | Awesomely Luvvie […]
I wanted to go to bed so badly last night, but I convinced myself that if I just stayed up staring at CNN that it really couldn’t happen. I finally went to bed around 3:30ish a.m., after Trump’s acceptance speech. Then I just laid there awake wondering WTF just happened? How the F did this just happen? I have begged and pleaded with people in my universe (physical and cyber) to consider the words being said, the actions, the bullying, the misogyny, the xenophobia. I asked people to use their common sense, their eyes and ears and pay attention and not just fall for the shouts of “Isis!” and “believe me!” and “Make America Great Again” and “Hillary wants to take your guns”. I am sad to know far too many people who voted for Trump. People who would not take their fingers out of their ears while singing “la la la la la” to actually HEAR what was being said. I am broken hearted for Hillary, the person qualified for the J.O.B. I am scared of the future. I fear for people I love who are not white, heterosexual “Christians”. I tried with people I know. I literally begged people to PLEASE understand that NOBODY IS TRYING TO TAKE YOUR GUNS (I live in a rural, hunting, gun-loving part of the country) and know people who based their vote solely on “Hillary isn’t taking MY guns!” I guess I should not have held back when I wanted to say, “Are you a fucking idiot? Are you out of your fucking mind? Are you really this ignorant?” I tried to be nice, not to say “You don’t need guns” but to point out the TRUTH that nobody is trying to take them, but people don’t listen. I have been so happy and proud of the Obama’s and happily voted for President Obama twice. I felt progress being made in this country. I argued with people who tried to marginalize these fine people, “They’re black” “he’s from Kenya” “he’s not even an American”. I don’t know how people live in the same country I have been living in for the last 8 years and don’t see what I see. I would never go back and change my vote and NOT vote for Obama, but had I known that 8 years of as close as we could get to heaven would be followed by absolute hell, I actually would have rethought my vote for Hillary. While I believe in Hillary and WANT her to be the president, if I had seen the writing on the wall (and it was obviously there, it had to have been), I would have thrown all in behind a “mainstream” white man. It was too good to be true to believe that we could follow up a “black” president with a “woman” president (and if people believe that Bernie could have won, they are mistaken as well, the same fucks who wouldn’t vote for a woman would not vote for a Jew). It shouldn’t be, but it obviously was too good to be true. I am so sad today. I am trying to be hopeful, trying to see what good comes of this, but I only see an abyss and I am terribly, terribly sad. I don’t even feel relief that “at least I’m a white woman” because lots of people died in concentration camps who were only guilty of trying to help those being persecuted. Only Bubba with his mullet, his gun and his half shirt should be feeling good right now.
I am so sorry. I am so sorry. I come from a country that voted in a president and vice president who were behind our post election violence 5years prior. It was fear and hate motivated with the fear of other… One of them oversaw the burning of innocent people who had gone to a church to seek refuge. People killed, displaced, raped and property stolen had to watch as these two became the most powerful people in the land. Then they systematically destroyed the credibility of the International Criminal Court as they destroyed their case killing and paying off witnesses.
America you were our hope. Barack still has roots in this same country and I hoped America would be progressive enough to vote HRC, that they would protect their people more than we have and that we’d be inspired to change things like you have…. I am so sorry. I don’t have any encouragement just tears for my POC and the many Kenyans who escaped here to go there and have another nightmare to live…
God hold us together and give us a miracle …
I thank God for the few 33%, there is still hope. So I better be careful how I treat white people. Don’t want to change the 33% to the 57% red neck for next election.
Peace and Love to you all….I’m going home to have another good cry and to think about my future….Been here three times before. This will be the worse one yet….
I am an African American woman. My 28 year old son told me last night before the polls even closed that Trump would win. This morning as reality dawned I asked him “why?” He said that the establishment would elect a black man before they would ever let a woman in the Oval. I don’t have much of note to add. I came here to read the comments and to be amongst others with my grief.
This! Soooooo much this. I love you for articulating what I’m still trying to find words in the English language to. Told a friend I may need to do it in tongues to get it right.
Firstly. I’m not American nor do I live there (Guyanese born and bred – from Guyana, South America). I however felt this loss as if I were American. I haven’t shed tears and that’s all. But I have a lump in my throat that refuses to go away. I stayed home from work yesterday to Election watch (I’ve been doing this for many elections) and I’ve been at home all day today because I’m too depressed to even get out of bed.
America! Oh America! How could you? How could you descend so low to elect someone who one would have to dig about 12 feet into the bowels of the earth to find a mustard seeds of moral fibre? How could you America? How could you?
How could you not foresee the consequences of this asinine decision. How could you ‘give’ a man the highest post in the Free World whose intelligence can fit into a match box.
I ranted all day today. My Facebook page is a blitz of ventilations. Yet the awful pain in my throat remains. My chest still hurts and I still want to cry. I think it would have been better if I did but the tears wouldn’t come.
But you did this to Hillary. You did this to Obama. You did this to the rest of the world. We were counting on you to do the right thing. To be patriotic. To put love of country above everything. How could you?
So this is what we’re left with. The aftermath of your decision. You have foisted an Enabler in Chief and Master Wall Builder on us. A man who is more likely to put his foot in his mouth in this volatile world and trigger World War III. How can we ever forgive you?
I still can’t come to grips that you’ve elected a man endorsed by the KKK! The KKK people. Who are living, breathing among you and who have to hide no more. They’ll be coming out of the woodwork to do their dastardly deeds. And that’s the least of your problems. I shudder to even think of them.
Guess I wouldn’t be using my visa for another 4 years. HOW COULD YOU?!?!?!?!?!?
I am bereft and disgusted with my nation as never before. I cannot even look at white people without thinking, “Are you responsible for this travesty? Are you trashy and deluded enough to have voted for the Cheeto?” It is tragic that they will vote to preserve white male superiority in face of all reason and logic – even the women!!!
But, after we take some time (no more than a week) to morn, let us turn back to the battle. Let’s be ready to send a message in the 2018 mid-terms – we can limit the damage the Cheeto can do if we elect a raft of Democrats.
There are no words to describe how sad And bereft I am feeling. This is just a surreal moment I am just sick inside.
You are a hateful bitch. YOU are what’s wrong with the world. We need to be spreading love and unity and peace not anger, hate and racism. Human beings are destroying each other with hate and anger, murdering animals and destroying the environment and we do not need hateful writing to fuel the fire.
I think the only hateful person here is you. How is Luvvie spreading hate and racism? Yes she’s angry. We’re ALL bloody angry. But all she is doing is stating facts. Nothing but them there FACTS ma’am.
NOTHING about this piece, or any of Luvvie’s writing (including her awesome book) is hateful*. If you’re seeing hate from this, then you need to look at yourself and your filters.
*apart from deserved disgust at this election result
This is her blog, she can do/say whatever she damn well pleases, hypocrite. Mad because she has friends and followers and you don’t.
WHUT? You coming to THIS BLOG and logging on to call someone you don’t know a ‘hateful bitch’ just won you that crown, sister.
Please just go home, put on your PETA t-shirt, and write a sad poem in your cruelty-free journal while the adults are talking.
Truth!
that made me most angry yesterday these fools with their 3rd party votes. i have volunteered as aa pollworker for 18 years and had NEVER in that whole time seen a write in ballot. Yesterday there were 7!…7!!! from Bernie Sanders, to Jill Stein to literally 2 people i have never even heard of
I’m a white woman who is married to a black woman. I raised my voice and argued with people who said they were voting for the orange squirrel or a third party. I’m sorry that my people fucked this up so badly. I wanted them to do better, I wanted them to care about you, and about my family. I’m so very sorry.
Latina piping in. Thank you so much for articulating this all of this. I have two small girls, I want to make this world better for them. I am gutted by the decision made by half the nation. But this orange sexist racist conman fuck is not the other half of the country’s president. He doesn’t deserve us, he is a national disgrace. I am heartbroken that Obama was never given the respect he deserved, but I am happy at least they can get the hell out of that hate hole with their heads held high.
Today, I my attitude is Fuck (a lot of) White People. Just like they said with their votes: Fuck Black People, Fuck Latino People, Fuck LGBTQ People, Fuck Immigrant People, Fuck Decency. And today, I cry. But tomorrow, I fight.
There we go feeling sorry for Hillary and her white tears. Y’all have time to feel compassionate for a woman of whiteness who had no direct or meaningful position for Black people. I have no idea why black Americans felt she cared about you. Trump is the anti-Christ and that alone is the only reason why anyone with any sense would vote for that wishy-washie woman of whiteness. And hell yes to #Blaxit. Pack my people. Pack.
I don’t even know where to begin. This was the first place I thought to come because I’m taking comfort in the voices here. I’m a black woman married to a white man and living in North Dakota. I wish I could explain the numbness and isolation I feel. Fortunately, a friend of mine and I had planned a post-election dinner for tomorrow. I think we’re going to skip dinner and just get drunk. I’m moving in a couple of weeks, and now feel the need to check the Southern Poverty Law Center’s website before we go. Thanks to everyone here for showing your heart and your fight. Give me a day or two and I’ll be in it with you. I wish I could find Hillary so we could cry together.
You poor dear, your candidate didn’t win. I voted for her too but rather than writing a very devisive article perhaps you could stop the pity party and after your kale smoothie think about why Clinton lost. The issues were not misogyny, climate change or gay marriage they were Universal Health Care, Jobs, Immigration, Terrorism and the Economy. Too many families are scraping by, too many American companies (and jobs) going overseas, too many undocumented immigrants, etc. Hillary fell short on a plan for all the issues. Her answers didn’t speak to middle America. “Universal Health Care saved Medicare by funding it” (WHAT?). Lets get to work on finding out how to help American households for a win in 2020. BTW Trump got the majority of the black voters.
You’re doing what trolls do – lie. Trump did not carry black voters; he carried white women. And if Hillary fell short, Trump dug a hole – he has no plan, just talk. Lord, you’re an idiot.
Name calling, always an educated comeback. If this is the company I keep in being a Hillary supporter I’ll rethink my democratic standing.
You aren’t entirely off the hook for opening up with the extremely patronizing, “You poor dear…” so please stop pretending you are above this all, especially with the bold face lie in your statement.
“BTW Trump got the majority of the black voters.”
Receipts, please.
Trump has the fucking Klan planning a victory parade, and you’re calling Luvvie divisive? Say that word terrorism one more time…think about what it really means. For the record, I’m white, educated, and not above name calling when it’s earned, you ignorant, condescending liar.
He didn’t really but no one was paying attention anyway. It’s not a black/white male/female presidency. Hillary was short too many votes. Stop the drama, accept defeat with grace. Life will go on and America will still be great.
No, Hillary won the popular vote so technically was not “short too many votes.” Stop the lies, accept facts with humility. Life will go on as long as you’re not in Trump & Co’s crosshairs and America will still be a great place to be white.
I wrote an article last October that said Trump was the evil that white people created by doing nothing and hoping he would go away. I also said unless they did something he would win because he was not the problem of the minorities he offends, but that of white nihilism. Hate that I was right.
[…] An American Tragedy – The New Yorker Here’s Why We Grieve Today | john pavlovitz About the Heartbreak of America’s Choice | Awesomely Luvvie This Week (Last Night) I Learned: Volume 61 | Brenna Clarke Gray Stay | Stirrup Queens Fighting […]
I read this, “I have NO LOVE for those who consider themselves “good people” but stand idly by as the world crumbles around them” and stood up and cheered. So much this. And I am tired af of dancing around their white fragility so they don’t shed any white tears. This Latina loved your book and is in love with this blog.
To blame all white people is wrong. I am white and most certainly did not vote for Trump. Please don’t lump all of us together.
EXACTLY.
[…] A Great Read About the Heartbreak of America’s Choice by Luvvie […]
I would like to say as a Mexican-American woman, my Latina sisters also showed up with 68% of us voting for HRC. I apparently lived in a bubble where I did not realize how deep the hatred of women runs and for that shame on me. I stand with my head held high and my heart strong for I live to fight another day. And make no mistake. I WILL continue to fight.
It’s hard to step back from all the news and Facebook posts and discussions the past 2 days. With all of that out there, this was the best thing I’ve read. Because what the fuck?? I’m a white woman and I really have no explanation for what the other ones were thinking. I know I have a lot to do, and I will.
There were white women at Trump rallies just coming right out and saying that they don’t think women should hold the office of president. Some of them don’t think women should hold any position of authority. They need their ovaries revoked.
Oh, I can tell you what other white women were thinking. They were behaving in the way that the constant infantilization of white women has conditioned them to behave. They were thinking that a big strong macho man is automatically better than any woman. They were thinking that the way men tell things must be the right way, and so if the men don’t care about the integrity of their bodies, then that’s obviously fine. And they were thinking, infantilized as they are, just like a baby would, only about themselves, not about the country, not about all the people who will suffer because of this. They were making the kind of idiotic mindless show of loyalty to men for which white women are applauded, and refusing even a basic level of instinct for self-preservation and basic dignity which white women are conditioned by patriarchy to disregard as soon as they are born.
I am white and I want to say it: Luvvie is correct. This is the responsibility of white people. And it is the responsibility of those white women who know better to start educating those who do not, to identify themselves loudly as feminists, to stop being nice to bigots and misogynists, to stop worrying about seeming bitchy or difficult, to START BEING DELIBERATELY bitchy and difficult because those words are just code for ‘not cooperating with people who don’t care if you are raped, who see you as flesh to be used or as decoration or service, and who are fully behind the patriarchy’. Being nice to men is stupid and irresponsible. Men are not a prize worth sacrificing our dignity and personhood. We do not need to placate them or collude with them in our own oppression.
White women need to start reading all the work that has been done on this topic. It’s called feminism. Go find yourself some. Better yet, start reading womanist thought and have your mind blown. Womanists and black feminists and other feminists of color are doing incredible work. We need to learn from them and apply it and fix this.
White women are the only demographic in this country who are both privileged and oppressed. But our privilege means we have no excuse to be cooperating in our own oppression. Over half of us just did.
This is the argument of people who wont be badly affected by what he said he would do. Or affected at all. Luxury
You are correct that it is a luxury, an unearned privilege, and totally unfair that people will or won’t be harmed by this regime according to how they look or their gender or sexual orientation. And if you read my argument as telling people to get educated about feminism and to reject patriarchy, then yes, that is the luxury people have when they are not having to worry about their physical safety, losing their jobs, getting deported, etc. It is entirely unfair and horrendous, but I believe it is still the next step for white women who don’t even know what sort of world patriarchy makes when it is enabled as it just has been.
Thank you, Sarah. I admire your ability to lay it out clean and simple. And not to get defensive when someone lays blame or says a critical word about privilege. Your example is very helpful. And this: “White women are the only demographic in this country who are both privileged and oppressed. But our privilege means we have no excuse to be cooperating in our own oppression.” I have never seen it expressed so clearly and efficiently as this.
Your angry at the wrong people. Hillary Clinton lost the election, the DNC knew she was the weaker candidate but decided to sacrifice the party and country because of one woman’s personal ambitions.
The country rejected Clinton back in 2008, and apparently the DNC made a Faustian bargain with the Clintons that it was her “turn” in 2016. They limited debates and rigged the primaries in her favor, even while all evidence showed she would lose to Trump, and get destroyed by Cruz.
I am tired of the Democratic Party establishment and their supporters throwing everyone they can think of under the bus marked “blame” to avoid even a second of personal reflection or analysis. Clinton and the DNC’s job was to convince voters to come out for her. She never gave one press interview to address any of the charges or allegations lodged against her. Months into the election and not even one interview, you are applying for the job, no matter how impressive your resume is, you still have to do the interview. After scandal after scandal broke, instead of addressing concerns and trying to win over voters, she chose to just give us celebrity endorsements. Beyonce and I are not in the same tax bracket and she and I have different concerns.
The truth is that Hillary Clinton and the Democrats with her on the corporate right-wing have hollowed out and subverted the party for their own benefit. They were trounced in winnable Congressional races and they have stymied the careers of any candidate not willing to toe their line. They selected mind-bogglingly poor candidates like Evan Bayh and Tim Murphy in Florida, to run for office while the media congratulated them on how clever they were to concoct a strategy of so closely resembling the Republicans that they might catch a few Republican votes.
Their Florida strategy highlighted how broken the DNC establishment has become. They sidelined Grayson, who was called the most effective member in the House, in favor of former Republican Murphy. Murphy’s father promised them $10 million, that never materialised. Grayson had the ground game and more popular support, but his own party went against him, even though all the polls showed Grayson would beat Rubio. They lost Florida and Rubio won, that was a winnable race for the DNC, and they blew it.
They failed the people they purport to protect and represent and they should be ashamed of themselves. They were cheering Donald Trump’s candidacy because they complacently believed it would see them into power. They were willing to overlook the public mood and lived experience in order to anoint one of their own and by so doing they played fast and loose with the country and the planet. They are an absolute disgrace.
Save your anger and recriminations for the people who deserve it. The DNC failed us, Hillary arrogantly believed she could win on celebrity endorsements alone. People were hurting and felt forgotten, and she told us things were great and this was as good as it was going to get. Its a deeply cynical message that didnt resonate with voters.
Everyone I knew could see this coming and it wasnt due to her gender but her policies. People believed the bogus polls when all evidence told them the contrary. Blame Podesta for colluding with the press to overcount voters so she had a fake 12 point lead. If they were honest perhaps they wouldnt have been so much voter apathy on election day. Trump got less votes than both Romney and McCain.
One last thing, as a third party voter I was told for months by Clinton supporters that Hillary didn’t need or want my vote. Since hearing that I wouldn’t dream of insulting her by voting for her.
She and her supporters constantly denigrated Bernie Sanders and the people who voted for him, seemingly oblivious to the prospect of them being irremediably alienated.
Then, once she secured the Democrat nomination, they couldnt wait to shit on Sanders supporters, and then began to attack Jill Stein and her supporters, rather than make an effort to win them over.
Insulting people whose votes you need is not a smart strategy. Hubris will come to bite you in the ass every time.
Bill Clinton famously said in 2008 that he wasnt afraid of alienating black voters when he attacked Obama, because those voters have nowhere to go. He forgets that when people have nowhere to go they stay home. That may explain the low voter turnout this election.
I’m so sorry for your pain and fear. Yes, my coon ass white family almost all voted Republican. I wish I could control them, but I can’t. I have talked myself blue. I am here. I am listening. I am grieving with you. I am standing with you. I wish I could do more. All I have done, so far, is raise white children who are passionate about inclusion and love. I hope it will someday be enough.
Time to watch for the shenanigans in the executive branch. They are coming. We are gonna hafta document all the stupid and keep all the receipts.
It’s a ways away, but 2020 is coming and that is the time to get our returns.
Thank you Sarah Novodny for your honest, accurate yet hard to swallow version of white women’s oppression because it is accurate and real. As an educated white woman I have been seething and frothing, my husband and dog have been in hiding. Actually I took her to daycare as she was previously abused and my rants were scaring her. I have two friends ( I use that term loosely since I’m totally pissed) that voted for the devil incarnate. One of whom told me it was because he was a true patriot- now that’s a good one. A draft dodging, disrespecting John McCain and Gold Star family kind of patriot. The other due to Pro life views which clearly states that they take precedent over the humans already on this planet that may suffer due to their race, sexual orientation/ persuasion- you get the point. A wise man ( there are some) told me that my soul has not been stolen yet challenged and that how I respond will dictate what’s in my soul. Well put but I’m still not happy. I had to face a man in yoga class tonight who spent the summer harassing me about my political views. I was not excited but I needed some yoga. He was kind, friendly and said nothing at all..after a full three months of nonsense. So maybe there is some hope for these blind fools. I am going to devote the next 4 years listening to people’s concerns and biases and then give them some education on whatever racist, homophobic ignorant views they may have. Otherwise I may kill someone and prison doesn’t look good on me.
I went to bed at 8:30 (pacific time). I wanted one more night thinking we would have our first woman president.
What to do? Organize NOW for 2018. It’s our next chance. Find good candidates, raise money, go to your local Democratic Party (it’s all we have, folks) meetings. Volunteer.
And SPEAK OUT. You don’t have to be rude, just correct the record. Never hear a racist, sexist, etc remark without politely disagreeing. Stand for no bigoted jokes. Write to your congress people about crap bills meant wreck your or someone else’s life.
Demonstrate peacefully. It’s your right.
Someone referred to Florida as “america’s dick” That’s exactly what that state has proven to be; first in 2000 and again in 2016
I’m a white woman and I’ve spent so much time wondering what the hell white women were thinking voting for and supporting him….after reading this I understand a little more and like it all even less.
http://qz.com/835567/election-2016-white-women-voted-for-donald-trump-in-2016-because-they-still-believe-white-men-are-their-saviors/
So I am curious. Have you finally come to grips with the reality of this election or are you still off in lala land? Another thing that confounds me is; if one for your criteria for your postings is that you can defend it. How is it that you still have this post up?
[…] Electoral College altogether. There’s plenty of anger, too, with blame to make it extra spicy. Luvvie Ajayi lays the whole mess squarely at the feet of white women. Others blame the DNC, the FBI, Breitbart,Wikileaks, the […]
Oh, Luvvie. You got all Old Testament on us, and some of us are hurt and even pissed off at you for “blaming” us. {cue hand to forehead and subsequent swooning} But you’re right: my demographics – White women 45-64 and White Protestant women – voted strongly for Trump. I look at those numbers and am shocked because honestly it didn’t occur to me that women, especially more life-experienced (i.e. OLDER) women, would think Trump was en even remotely reasonable choice. But they did, and at first I felt betrayed by them (hah! now I get why you are so damn angry, and rightfully so) but then I realized I haven’t been listening. The word that came into my head as I awoke Nov. 9, clear as the voice of Old Testament God setting a bush (the whole damn nation) on fire? RECKONING. I understand privilege pretty well but only now do I see how it blinds some of us – my white cohorts but also me – to reality, specifically other people’s reality, because, hey, we gotta do what’s right for “us,” right? I understand how culture shapes worldview and behavior but now we see starkly how even people not IN power (women) feel it necessary and sufficient to side with those in power who oppress them but, hey, that’s the natural order and besides THAT woman is a bitch and a criminal and she is so PUSHY. I have the privilege of staying quiet and “let’s just see how things go” and hanging on the sidelines as horrible things happen (to OTHER people) because I easily “pass,” and you know I have something to lose and people need to stand up for themselves and BLAH BLAH BLAH. Shame on my cohorts, send down the fireballs and locusts, and wake us all the fuck up so we can have some compassion and grow the huevos to stand with the so-many people now caught in the crosshairs. I voted for Sanders, then Clinton, but I didn’t listen to everyone around me doing otherwise, and it’s my bad for being caught by surprise instead of preaching to and fighting hard with all the idiots in my midst. I am so sorry my cohorts’ – and my own – ignorance is raining hellfire down on everyone. I am walking away from them to think about stuff and to LISTEN for what We Who Give a Shit can do next.