NorthFace Strengthens Me

Y’all already know this winter has been on some Kentucky Freeze-A-b*tch type stuff. It’s been horrendous. I’ve quit Chicago a plethora of times, telling it to pack its sh*t and GO and I meant it. It actually had the nerve to be -11 for a couple of days. What in the not-so-hot pits of Dereon hades? *Sigh* But y’all know I love the Windy to the core. Like Google, Chicago is that abusive husband who kicks me in my throat often but I stay with anyway because he is nice to me for 3 months out the year. I can change HIM, ok? hehe

My regular winter jacket is a Kenneth Cole Trench thats actually quite warm (and cute to boot). But a couple of weeks ago, I decided to go invest in a NorthFace coat (yes, I consider anything you spend over $200 an investment. And, of course I wait til most of winter is over to make this decision. *Side-eye*). And I’ve seen a lot of folks rocking this cute long NorthFace jacket that looked soooo warm. It didn’t look like one was wearing a puffy sack nor did it look like folks were doing their best Michelin Man impression. I trotted to the NorthFace store on Michigan Avenue and described the coat to a worker and they knew exactly what I was talking about.

I goes to find it and I see a rack of them with a sign of 25% off. I sweahfoGAWD and 3 wise White men that I did a lil jig. I scooted my feets and slid across the floor like Usher from the “Burn” video. BEST.DEAL.EVER! Thinking that you are going to pay full price for something and finding out its cheaper is better than:

  • Finding $10 in the pocket of the jeans I hadn’t worn in a while (I was so thrilled I made it my Facebook status)
  • Realizing that “Scrubs” was coming back for an 8th season (I need some JD in my life)
  • Getting an “A” on the paper I finished 15 minutes before it was due (the story of my entire college career)

Bought the jacket for $75 less than the retail price so I was all grin at that cash register, and armed with my new (and first ever) NorthFace jacket (henceforth known as Northie), I felt confident that I could handle whatever winter could throw at me.

Of course, it ended up being super warm for most of last week, reaching 60 degrees on Tuesday, so I was unable to put on my newest purchase. Yesterday though, the high was 35 degrees and I was super geeked to put on the jacket. My sister goes “You best wear a tank top under that coat because clearly you won’t need nothing else.” Me: “Thou shan’t hate on me and my coat. Kthanx”.

I put on a thin sweater and Northie. I walked outside and was like “PSHT its NICE out here. What cold??” whistling and sh*t. And I kid you not, after like 5 minutes, I touched my forehead like “Is that… noo… that’s actually SWEAT.” In 30 degree weather. This jacket is AWESOME! I had to unzip it for a bit to air myself out. And I get cold easily. Hell, I don’t have ANY natural insulation so any help I can get is welcome.


I can do all things (in winter) through NorthFace which strengthens me (and my defenses against the bitter cold). Bring it on, Chicago!! I’m ready!

*Looks outside* Are the birds returning from the South? Oh HELL NAW! I need at least one week’s use from this coat. Ain’t that about a b*tch?!?

P.S. And no, I’m not getting paid for this. I just truly stan for that coat. But umm… NorthFace, if y’all wanna throw a coupla things my way, I ain’t too proud. *crickets* No?? Dang, y’all are stingy! *sings* Don’t be stttiiinnnggggaaayyyy (from McDonald’s commercial)
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  1. Naturally Sarcastic
    February 16, 2009 at 9:18 am

    The Simpsons! I sing that same version to my sibs!

    Never had a Northface but I know what I will be investing in for next winter cuz the IZOD was boo boo the non-cold wind fighting fool!!

  2. Nicki Sunshine
    February 16, 2009 at 9:49 am

    U ain’t lying about Kentucky freeze. LOL.

    Loving the coat. U are gonna make me go get one.

  3. Ms_Slim
    February 16, 2009 at 3:19 pm

    I’ve got a JLo down that Ive had for like 4 years. I NEED to get another coat…just cuz. But I havent yet. Girl I say even if the weather STAYS this beautifullness it’s been on lately (crossing fingers bc I HATE HATE HATE HAAAATE the Chi winter), just pack it up til next year. Aint nothin wrong with it! 🙂

  4. eclectik
    February 16, 2009 at 4:46 pm

    Not a bad coat…I want a TFG (Eventhough I dont need another coat)
    Awww if you get cold Im comin…esp if I can get some places traded 🙂


  5. (vixenchick)
    February 16, 2009 at 7:14 pm

    its from the simpsons! micheal jackson sang it.

  6. sabrina
    February 16, 2009 at 9:48 pm

    TFG! OMG! I had one of those…well, actually I had two, in high school. They were white and HUGE. I spilled Hawaiian Punch on my coat, but my brother left his at home while he was at college, so I claimed it as my own. There’s nothing like the coat that makes you feel like a little white bird…

    iQuit Chicago in the wintertime and I mean it! I’ll see y’all in July!

  7. The Pretty Brown Girl
    February 16, 2009 at 11:39 pm

    It just doesn't get that cold in DC often enough to justify that coat! It is fly as hell though, I'd be stylin' on the DMV hoes in it! Hahaha!! Cute & Toasty.

    See, all that Chicago cold is what keeps me from moving there, cuz I actually love that city. I couldn't see myself living in that frozen tundra of a city after growing up in a sweltering swamp, aka The Nation's Capital.

  8. suga
    February 17, 2009 at 12:36 am

    Hilarious post, as usual.

    I dont know nothin about no Northface, even though some folks rock ’em out here, they probably only get to wear them 2 weeks out of the year lol

    February 17, 2009 at 3:23 pm

    We are getting shot up here (Prince George’s County) for our Northface

    no really..someone recently was shot for there Northface …following the aftermath of someone else being shot for their Jordan’s

    but thats the style P G cats wear Northface in all colors of the rainbow

    This post was a hilarious unintended plug for Northface

    its always good to meet another lifetime member of IBTC as well! Peace and blessings 🙂

  10. Blackberry Molasses/The Rebel Intellectual
    February 17, 2009 at 9:24 pm

    I was DONE at Kentucky Freeze-A-Bitch!!! Guhl, you need to stop. I can’t be laughing that hard right after dinner… not good for my ‘gestion (digestion for those of you who don’t have country ass in-laws).
    That Northface is tooo cute! I’ve been wanting one for a couple of winters now but it doesn’t get QUITE cold enough in the Illadelph. No matter… I’m coppin that biznitch on clearance from the website in a week or two.


  11. Luvvie (aka Queen IG)
    February 19, 2009 at 11:49 pm

    Naturally Sarc – YESSS!! U get points for the Simpson’s reference. And IZOD sucked? WOMP.

    Nicki – *chanting* get it, get it! lol

    Ms. Slim – Guess you spoke too soon. It’s cold as hell now. YAY Northie!!

    Eclectik – LOL!

    Vixen – Ding ding ding! U’s right!

    Sabrina – yeah, I wish I could quit my city till July too

    PBG – Lucky duck!

    Suga – Northface is the gold medal of winter coats. White folks love it

    Lioness – Dang!! Folks is getting thieved for the ‘face?? Thats sad.

    BBmo- Yes, holla @ that clearance