Whose Mighty Mouse Swag Brother is This? Featuring Roast From My Readers
Yesterday, I was perusing Tumblr when I came across the picture of a strapping young lad, captured by someone on public transportation. I posted the picture on my Awesomely Luvvie Facebook page and the comments my readers replied with were better than anything I could come up with.
I laughed SO hard at the comments under this picture that I literally was gasping for air. WHAT. IS. AIR?!?!
See below for some of the best ones. And if you wanna see the rest of the comments, they’re on my Facebook fan page.
“Sir…the village of schmedium called. They would like their entire wardrobe back. Somebody in my house that shall remain nameless said “I know his titties hurt.” *dead* – KKH
“This big rusty swole ass ninja done put on his niece’s extra smarge bodysuit. The ones that snap at the crotch. Then them Baby Phat jeggings” – LVA
“It’s like he put his entire self in the dryer!” – JS
“He looks like a Black Lil Abner!” – DNL
“Black Hulk Smash!” – LJ
“Black Hulk need 2 iPhone in case Hulk get mad and SMASH one.” – PW
“He just did 20yrs, they gave him back the clothes he was arrested in. That’s 20yrs of that state pen workout plan.” – LM
“Our ancestors picked way too much cotton for him to be micro-managing fabric.” – SU
“Like RuPaul and the Hulk had an angry, nearsighted child.” – DS
“Oh no! That outfit is too tight, he didn’t put that on that morning, he had to grow up in it.” – EW
“His balls have a yeast infection!” – DJB
“Is that outfit from The Green Mile collection?” – EW
“I didn’t know that Popeye’s Brutus was Black.” – RH
“Jesus be spanxx around me everyday…. (take it to the bridge) I know you can, I know you will…hold these seams if I just be still…” – CB
“Them people sittin next to him can hear his clothes crying.” – SMM
“Those jeggings tho Jesus be an inseam cause they are ready to burst I simply cannot.” – SB
“His clothes done cut off my circulation. Smh” – DZS
“This dude shirt size is 6-9 months.” – SC
“Little did Kal-El know his costume wasn’t quite right as he attempted to blend in with the Earthlings. He kept calm but wondered why they stared and giggled at him. Did they know he was Superman. Maybe he shouldn’t have watched MTV for disguise ideas he though quietly to himself.” – CM
“he’s in mid incredible hulk right now. not quite to the point of bursting out of his clothes and running down the street with those little shorts on…but veeery close. LOL!” – LR
“Lol! Surely he’s related to the incredibles!” – FO
“Nipples showin…pants so tight i can count the change in his pocket…i cannot, i will not!” – MW
“I’m going to grab a Bath & Body Works candle and begin a vigil for not only the fabric but the thread. *amen*” – DR
“Chick next to him wondering why he stole her pants” – KL
‘In the words of Madea…”Look at you, looking like you looking!”. WEAK!’ – SR
“He farts, and that entire train will derail from the pressure change.” – DZS
“if he sneezes, he’ll be butt naked in a moment’s time” – TNV
“My friend just said he looks like he can breastfeed a small country lmao” – JM
“Throw a pitcher of water in him and he’ll never get those jeans off without a pair of scissors.” – DZS
“You just know there is a naked smurf somewhere, cuz this bamma arse negro done stole his clothes!!” – YM
“This dude is true fit impaired and cares not one bit that he looks like a baked potato in a wetnap.” – SC
“Mirror mirror on the wall, so you say these pants aren’t too tight at all?” – DL
I am CRYING re-reading these. The old, present AND future me is dead and gone. DEAD, I SAY! Omg. Can I just say how much I LOVE my readers? Y’all are EVERYTHING!
But yeah. Whose bro is this? And why is he so squozed up (yes, squozed) in this alphet?!?
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60 Comments
Can y’all just make sure that I ain’t looking a mess at my funegro? Oh and make sure mama is comforted. It will be a classy affair, complete with an all white wardrobe and all red velvet buffet.
I’m waiting for someone at my office to ask me what’s wrong, with all these tears in my eyes. Goodness.
OMG! Thank you this just made my LIFE! I am about to get terminated at my place of employment for laughing so hard at this! Yes,Yes your readers are flippin EVERYTHING!!
“Jesus be spanxx around me everyday…. (take it to the bridge) I know you can, I know you will…hold these seams if I just be still…” – CB
DNR (Do not resuscitate) my life is complete.
I read the comments yesterday on FB and was crying so hard. Brilliance at it’s best.
Luvvie, you are NOT good for my health and well-being! Oh mylanta, I cannot stop laughing! I laughed so hard I started wheezing and coughing and I ain’t eem asthmatic. Scrise! My co-workers thought I was going bonkers until I showed them the pic and read a couple of the comments.
im just mad even his shoes look to little. sir…where is teh back of your shoe??!? he done stole a toddlers lips ons. i am unable
and are we really not gon address this murse sitting in front of him? oh we letting that slide? its luggage right?
how you headphones to little? you have failed at life when you cant fit one size fits all.
jesus be some shears to get him out that outfit.
image disturbed me so much i got all types of typis. lol
“Our ancestors picked way too much cotton for him to be micro-managing fabric.” Dying, dead, gone!
That one had me clutching my chest and pitching towards the floor. I am UNABLE!
YES! That’s the one that had me damn near on the floor. Lol
Yeah, that one took me to tears. Thanks, Luvvie, for consistently bringing the funny!
I have hot TEARS streaming down my face as if at a funeral! I am #DED as in way past dead. It took me 10 mins to get off the damn floor. I have to block your site to get anything done here today.
I’m tellin you! I laughed so hard that my stomach is sore. Swear this website is gonna be part of my workout plan!
“Our ancestors picked way too much cotton for him to be micro-managing fabric.” – SU
I died when I read that comment I had tears in my eyes y’all have no chills and I’m here for it Luvvie’s comment section is the best!!!
Sir,
I can actually see your cells multiplying through your shirt. I can see the blood coursing through your veins. I can actually take your white blood cell count individually. I can see your pores breathing. I actually counted 17 new hairs growing on your chest. Somewhere there is a laboratory missing this experimental fabric. Check the news y’all!
LMAO! White blood cells, though!
I almost choked on my Chipotle!!! Not the 17 new hairs?!
“I can actually see your cells multiplying through your shirt. I can see the blood coursing through your veins.”
Nooooooo!!!!! I wasn’t ready!!!Bwahahahaha!!!!
As a scientist, this made me scream! I am DEAD!!! You here me! DEAD! *flatlined*
THIS!
I don’t even want to imagine what his package looks like in those jeggings!
You dont have to imagine…If he stands up, you’ll be able to see! Keep it PG!! LOL!!
OMG!!….ROTFL! I cried and then I died. Then I came back to life and cried again! Stick a fork in me. I’m #done #unable
If anything, it’s a testimony to how strong and flexible cotton can be…truly the fabric of our lives.
That said, I wonder what it’s like to walk around in a tourniquet custom made by Hanes and Levi’s all day. Hell, I have tights and bras that don’t fit that snug….
“Truly the fabric of our lives” BWAHAHAHA!!
Hmmm. These weren’t skinny jeans when I bought them…
I want the name of the little foreign lady who sewed that alphet. Those stitches are a row of angry soldiers holding that man’s modesty together. Those seams must look like a chain link fence on his body. She puts every home ec teacher in retirement. That Singer sewing machine is life!
Lol, like I said last night, looks like he woke up a teenage girl and hulked out into this form! The other comments are GOLDEN!!! I am unable to can!
Just wanted to say that you ma’am are a treasure and a delight. And I’ve never been so happy that I followed somebody’s link on twitter and found your site…lol
That outfit could stop a bullet better than Kevlar.
BOINGGGG!!!
#dead LMAO
I just pulled an ovary laughing at this! If my future children come out wonky I am blaming you! LMB(and ovaries)O!!
“Luke Cage takes the crosstown express”
I’m ashamed to admit that this photo was definitely taken in London, on the underground. I recognise the train seaats and the tube map behind him. Glad I wasn’t on that train. He would have boxed me the way I would have been laughing!
Peep the chick next to him. She looking like she’s desperately trying not to touch any minuscule of his fabric for fear of the biscuit can bustin open.
I am so confused. Like why did he roll up the pants like they were long. CLEARLY they were not and never could be. Just…metrosexual style is NOT for the swole……
You can tell what state is on the quarter in his pocket. And he had the nerve to cuff his jeggings. He. Cuffed. His. Jeggings.
But the two people sitting next to him want to laugh so bad, but will not for fear he will completely bust out of his clothes and snap.
Wait a minute, looks like Wesley Snipes prepping for his breakout movie!
Got this far:
“Our ancestors picked way too much cotton for him to be micro-managing fabric.” – SU
and had to stop.
I’m at work and can’t get through the whole post because I’m trying to laugh quietly and it’s hurting my throat. Have to go outside and read on my phone or wait until I get home. 🙁
this was funny as hell.
I was crying while reading it
Kevin Hart called and asked for his clothes!
*delurks*
My boss just asked me what was wrong (cos I’m shakin ‘n’ quakin tryin to hold in the laughter n tears) …..and I work in a Psychiatric/Behavioral health office….if he only knew….
Now, where is Oil Can Harry?
*relurks*
*cackling* That was truly epic. Also, the Nicki gif is perfect for this post.
I read some comments on Tumblr about this pic…somebody said he looks like he was about to Hulk up, but then he cooled down halfway…LMAOOOOO
What I don’t understand is why he has on his first day of school outfit…..from when he was 6.I know you were late start bro,but don’t feel you gotta hold on and catch up on what you missed.smh
OVER HERE CRINE LAUGHING….DEEAD WITH MICHAEL JACKSON__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I can’t believe you’re so mean and making fun of his alphet!
Dang, it must take some TIME in the morning to paint on your clothes. Also, lord help us if he gets, um…excited. Those pants would explode like a grenade.
I think hes wearing his 9 year old brothers clothes…. maybe his woman burned all his?
PS- the comments on here are killing me and giving me life all at the same time… Im so confused lol
Leave that black Clark Kent alone, his other outfit might be in the dry cleaners.
Oh Jesus help me!! I have not laughed this hard in a long time. These comments were so funny. I am glad I was at home!!!
Our ancestors picked way too much cotton for him to be micro-managing fabric.” – SU OMG ON THE FLOOR WITH TEARS!
YOU ARE DONE FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR!
I haz the cackles
Arrange my funeral…Iam dead n gone!!! “Baked potato in a wetnap” R.I.P Here lies a lovely women who brutally laughed to death….
Ya’ll know he prolly stuck in that position.
“Our ancestors picked way too much cotton for him to be micro-managing fabric.” Hahahahaha!!! I can’t with this one. Though, those pants are so tight he can’t afford to bend both legs.
Shaming just ain’t funny.
“Our ancestors picked way too much cotton for him to be micro-managing fabric.” – SU
^^^^^^WINNER!
His name is Tom… Tom of Finland.
He is the brand ambassador model for the Chad Ochocinco Spring 2015 collection!
That must be the new “Body Trainer” outfit that all the guys are raving about!