Whose is this?

Whose Dentist is This? What’s Up With His Newborn Hair?

I was loitering on Facebook the other day when I came upon this picture and I did a silent laugh for about 15 seconds.

Dentist with bad hair

Someone musta taken this pic of an ad on public transportation, and it’s of a dude’s dentist practice. THIS HAIR, DOE. This hair. He looks so brand new. Like NEW human. Like a child just born and this is his first picture. You know, before they get that brush applied to their scalp.

Somebody gotta get bruh a du-rag so his babyhairs can lay down. He needs a Black friend to put him on game. Just tie it down before bed and 12 hours later, not only will your hair lay down, but those 360 degree waves in his hair will make people seasick. See? This is why everyone needs a Black friend.

I posted it on my Awesomely Luvvie FB page and the jokes came aplenty.

“His hair looks like he just slid out of the womb!” – CA

“Afterbirth and amniotic fluid make a damn good hair gel apparently” – CT

“His head is so big, and his hair so small…” – TB

“He woke up like dis…. and we want him to go back to bed.” – LAR

“The Barber asked him how he wanted his have cut and he told him “I’d like it to be a bit of nofuxgiven in the front, and a little bit of Iclearlyhavenodamnsstospare on the sides”” – AC

“*waits on someone who knows him to comment that he suffers from huge face lil hair disease so I can feel like crap*” – SG

“Why would you put this on your advertisement. That man can get nowhere near my mouth. He doesn’t make good choices.” – KR

“When you’re a dentist by day and a damn fool by night!” – ZC

“Got that Sloth from The Goonies fade. On Fleek x10” – DCP

“Or a new born kitten that was just licked by its mama” – JGN
newborn kitten

“His hairline is very disobedient or perhaps he has mange” – TW

“He’s advertising Cosmetic Dentistry and his hair looks like someone chewed it out!” – KWJ

“He looks like a wet duck! He thinks he’s fly tho’.” – DMC

“What’s crazy is that he’s actually handsome up to his hairline. Sad!” – MM

“His head looks like a camel was sucking on it.” – MS

“and whats so bad is he would look good with a bald head but why he is holding on to that hair they transplanted from his legs and those gray edges i will never know #fixitjesus” – AC

“When you trip and fall with a fork into an electrical outlet.” – MW

“Found this in my news feed again this morning, and it sent me into yet another fit of giggles. Lol! Why does he look like all his tracks got snatched out during a fight? This is how a lot of people look underneath their sew-ins. Reminds me of bald headed girls using hair gel.” – LAR

“He has that Theresa Giudice hairline and hair that looks like a wiry Terrier coat.” – ME

“thats the reverse wet skunk” – OLB

“Its like his face kept growing but his hair didnt get the memo to keep up.” – CK

“Have you ever seen a baby vulture that’s molting? Now you have.” – AR

“Anyone else notice that hint of a part right in the front? Like maybe he asked a dyslexic waxer for a Brazilian!” – AW

lmao literally


Whose dentist is this, though? Might you suggest some good weavologists to him if he insists on maintaining coiffure? We have technology to handle these issues now, ya know.

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  1. Milaxx
    October 19, 2015 at 7:53 pm

    Poor tink, tink, if he would just slick it back and stop trying to make them baby hairs stand up he would be alright.

  2. Rayo
    October 19, 2015 at 9:14 pm

    You know the way a baby duck looks? That’s how he looks on top.

  3. Mia
    October 19, 2015 at 10:10 pm

    I done told him to stop using that Flowbee with the vacuum set on high carpet….bare floors setting sir…bare floors

    • roberta
      October 22, 2015 at 10:12 am

      go get me a switch!

  4. October 19, 2015 at 11:14 pm

    I laughed so hard I am bawling. BAWLING!!! This post gave me a serious ab workout.

  5. October 20, 2015 at 12:09 am


  6. Mysti
    October 20, 2015 at 12:24 am

    I HATE this site! Do you know how awful it us to laugh THIS hard with a headache?!

  7. ho
    October 20, 2015 at 9:07 am

    I appreciate the honesty of “laughed silently for about 15 seconds” — which is usually what people mean when they overuse “LOL”

    See, the real “LOL” doesn’t come until the comments.
    All y’all are on timeout, by the way.

    • howlingbanshee
      October 20, 2015 at 9:08 am

      Also, I will never trust Autofill again. That’s me up there. I thought Autofill had my back.

      • October 20, 2015 at 10:09 am

        Wow, autofill really got you. That is unfortunate.

      • Mysti
        October 20, 2015 at 11:27 am

        Oooh, autofill is awfully shady!

  8. jcanwisegrrl
    October 20, 2015 at 10:42 am

    I too silent laughed, but for a whole minute. With tears. Oh mylanta! He ain’t got no mirrors? No wife, kids, friends, mousy receptionist with a tendre for him? He needs new people.

  9. jcanwisegrrl
    October 20, 2015 at 10:44 am

    I just looked at the pic again and scream-laughed, scaring my dog, cat and two birds. My word! Thanks for today’s laugh, Luvvie. *wipes tears*

  10. Erica
    October 20, 2015 at 11:29 am

    You gone send me straight to hell in a handbasket partaking in all this tomfoolery!!!

  11. Jennifer
    October 20, 2015 at 2:25 pm

    i shoulda known betta then to read this at work. I just let out a guffaw and my co-workers are all giving me the side eye. This made my entire day.

  12. notconvincedgranny
    October 20, 2015 at 2:33 pm

    Prosecutor: Did you, or did you not, douse your head with Elmer’s School Glue and rub your head through the vacuum cleaner bag at the SPCA?

    Doc: No sir, I did not. It was an Elmer’s Glue Stick.

  13. Tonia
    October 20, 2015 at 5:54 pm

    These comments had me in tears!!!!!

  14. mzmiamiheat
    October 23, 2015 at 8:27 am

    I guess he said his specialty is teeth, hair not so much

  15. Deanna
    November 6, 2015 at 3:25 pm

    I to know more about this man, so I googled weird hair dentist where I found a Reddit thread about this picture and a link to his profile picture.


  16. Abby
    November 12, 2015 at 6:50 pm

    Just gonna leave this here. wait for it….


    • trock7
      December 15, 2015 at 1:08 pm

      you are my hero…

    • Teresa
      December 16, 2015 at 10:49 am

      Seriously!!! He’s ‘married’! He’s wearing a wedding ring. My only thought is that she must not love him… His hair is much worse in the video than in the picture…

  17. Rich Ian
    December 15, 2015 at 10:13 am

    Still better than whatever black prayer candle melted on top of Jermaine Jackson’s head.

    • Tosha L Porter
      January 25, 2016 at 6:10 pm

      I have passed away from ur comment

  18. Chandler Holiday
    December 15, 2015 at 12:21 pm

    They must have been fresh out of the Robinson Crusoe hats at TeeBob’s, so he had to skin a nutria rat. I don’t think it’s working for him.

  19. Sandra
    December 15, 2015 at 11:06 pm

    So I’m up laughing silently so as to not wake my 2 year old but I keep snorting!!! O. My. Lanta. That man has the skin of an Opossum as a toupee. I simply cannot look at the pic anymore!