Nigeria’s First Lady (Patience Jonathan), Her Broken English and These Struggle Tears
I haven’t blogged about the Nigerian girls who were kidnapped but I’ve been keeping track of the story and posting my thoughts on my Facebook profile. I might write about it. Not sure. We shall see. But I haz many thoughts.
Anywho, Nigeria’s leaders have been super slow on reacting to this crisis (super ugh). Last week, Patience Jonathan (the president’s wife) was on tape speaking to some of those whose children were taken and what ensued is foolery.
See my country’s first lady outchea butchering English like some goat meat. I understand that broken English is what she’s probably more comfortable with but even when she attempted regular Anglais, she failed so bad. And this ain’t even because she has an accent. Nope. This is the speech of a woman who is the anti-articulate.
She is a legend in her lack of correct grammar. So much so that if you google her name, you’ll see things like Top Ten Grammatical Blunders Made By Patience Jonathan. Patience be outchea like Ralph Wiggum.
“PRINCEPA. Na only you waka come?” LMAOOOOOO!!! That had me rolling first. I just facepalmed. And we musnt forget “And all this bloods that they’re sharing.” WUT? O_o
“CHEI. CHEI. There is God O! DIERRIS GOD O!!!” How did she go from talking to all of a sudden wailing? Madame, abeg what is this drama? How did you get here? Can you return? What’s that gotta do with the price of tea in China?
She didn’t address n’an issue on the table. She just used her struggle tears to deflect and ain’t nobody got tahm for her and we don’t believe her. She needs more people.
Honestly, this is hilarious and sad at the same damb time. This woman is the First Lady and she’s basically a complete joke. Naija, see our lives in these streets. Come collect Auntie Patience, bro. Just disgraceful. She’s such a classless wonder.
P.S. I need a shirt that says “Only you waka come?” and “Dierris God o!” My countrymen, make it happen so I can sport it this summer.