10 of President Obama’s Funniest Lines from Nerd Prom 2013

Last night was the White House Correspondent’s Dinner, nicknamed “Nerd Prom” for obvious reasons. Conan O’Brien hosted it but President Barack Obama stole the show. He actually walked up to it while DJ Khaled’s “All I Do is Win” was playing. It’s his 2nd term and BROBAMA is letting folks know that he is running out of every damb to give. He wanted to stroll in to rap and dagnabbit, he did it.

The video is below, but even if you don’t watch it, I’ve picked out 10 of his funniest zingers. I actually did laugh at loud multiple times, because he was on FIRE last night, snatching wigs left and right. His speechwriters get so many props and he gets props for the delivery.

10 Funniest Obama Lines from Nerd Prom

1. “I look in the mirror and I have to admit, I’m not the strapping young Muslim socialist that I used to be.”

2. “I took 22 shots, made two of them. 2 hits, 20 misses. The executives at NBC asked, ‘What’s your secret?'”

3. “I’ve got 99 problems and now Jay-Z’s one.”

4. “I know CNN has taken some knocks lately,” Obama said. “I admire their commitment to cover all sides of the story, just in case one of them happens to be right.”

5. “The History Channel is not here. I guess they were embarrassed about the whole Obama-is-a-devil thing. Of course, that never kept Fox News from showing up. They thought that comparison was not fair… to Satan.”

CLEARLY, President Obama is like:

No Fucks Given gif

6. “I remember when BuzzFeed was something I did in college around 2 a.m. True story.”

7. “Did you know that Sheldon Adelson spent $100 million of his own money last year on negative ads? You’ve got to really dislike me to spend that kind of money. I mean, that’s Oprah money. You could buy an island and call it ‘Nobama’ for that kind of money. Sheldon would have been better off offering me $100 million to drop out of the race, I probably wouldn’t have taken it, but I’d have thought about it.”

8. “One thing they [Republicans] all agree on is that they could do a better job reaching out to minorities. Call me self-centered but I could think of ONE minority they could start with. *raises hands* HELLO! Think of me as a trial run.”

9. “Republicans fell in love with this thing [sequestering], and now they can’t stop talking about how much they hate it. It’s like we’re trapped in a Taylor Swift album.”

10. “I’m also hard at work on plans for the Obama Library. And some have suggested that we put it in my birthplace, but I’d rather keep it in the United States.”

As if those weren’t funny enough. The visuals he used during his speech were ALSO hilarious. Especially when he said he’s gonna start using one of Michelle’s tricks to become well-liked.

Obama In Bangs

I DON DIE! His team is full of FOOLS and I love it.

Good times. You might not like his politics but you gotta admit that the dude knows how to poke fun at himself. And when he’s done in 2016, if he opts to take this show on the road, I wouldn’t be mad. BRObama was in rare form.

I totally wanna be invited to Nerd Prom one day.

Did y’all watch the Nerd Prom? Whatcha think?

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  1. Milaxx
    April 28, 2013 at 5:41 pm

    My favorite was Stephen Spielberg’s Obama skit

  2. peachykeen
    April 28, 2013 at 5:42 pm


  3. April 28, 2013 at 5:50 pm

    I loved it! It was hilarious. He left no punch pulled. Love the gif you included, you always hit those right on the head.

  4. Nahjee
    April 28, 2013 at 6:25 pm

    All them albums taylor swift made singing bout them 1,000 men she been with. And still a damn virgin lol

  5. Gwen
    April 28, 2013 at 7:06 pm

    He killed.

  6. bebe
    April 28, 2013 at 7:11 pm

    I watched it and laughed so hard, The spielberg skit was funny. Conan was funny too, He had some pretty good jokes.

    • MrsB
      April 29, 2013 at 8:19 am

      L O L that Spielberg skit was Hilarious!

  7. April 28, 2013 at 7:29 pm

    LOLOL he snatched every wing, and scalp every fool in there. Best thing was watching some of those republicans straight faced not laughing at a thing. Like it’s a joke…lighten up. And how does Newts wifes hair not move at all. Like it’s literally a helmet haha.

    • Parker
      April 28, 2013 at 8:35 pm

      Newt was laughing a lot. Some folks didn’t crack not one smile, tho. I agree. He killed it. My favorite comment was “strapping young socialist…”

      • April 28, 2013 at 8:41 pm

        I did appreciate that Newt laughed a lot.

  8. Keisha
    April 28, 2013 at 8:03 pm

    I straight howled. My 7 month old laughed because I was laughing so hard

    • May 2, 2013 at 12:41 pm

      This made me giggle b/c my 3 yr old walked in, Mommy what’s funny? (turns to tv) Oh, Obama’s funny, Mommy? That made it funniER because YES.

  9. April 28, 2013 at 8:25 pm

    LMAOOOO!!! Luvvie thanks SO much for posting. I would’ve never watched this. I LOVED this. He slayed, snatched wigs, toupee’s, 27 pieces, hair plugs, no scalp was safe. Didn’t know he had it in him. Yasss!

  10. embraceurcrazy
    April 28, 2013 at 8:35 pm

    He’s amazing.

  11. Nptexas
    April 28, 2013 at 8:38 pm

    Thanks for this, Luvvie! I was trying to remember a couple lines. This helped. Great job. See you at the webinar Tuesday

  12. LisaLisa1908
    April 28, 2013 at 8:42 pm

    You left off my favorite one. “Rush Limbaugh tried to tell y’all, SECOND TERM BABY!” Lmao

  13. April 28, 2013 at 9:52 pm

    I loved the dig at Conan where the president says that they wasn’t.sure if he should give the gig to Conan or wait 5 years and give it to Jimmy Fallon

  14. janelfelice
    April 28, 2013 at 9:57 pm

    Second term Obama gives no dambs and I all the way here for him! He is letting his Southside show and I love it!

  15. ProfessLCH
    April 29, 2013 at 9:05 am

    POTUS was EVERYTHING. You could do a Part II, he had so many gems and dropped so much ether.

    Love your gif, too. My President is “The Hills Are Alive, Sound of Music” Fabulous (now TWIRL)!

  16. Brittni
    April 29, 2013 at 9:38 am

    I especially like when the camera pans to the anal types that are trying their hardest NOT to laugh but end up having to chuckle into their hand.

    Give it up, man, dude is funny. You don’t like him, but it’s cool, you can let the shade go for one night. There will be plenty more to offer tomorrow.

  17. April 29, 2013 at 1:28 pm

    I thought he was great. And Conan DEFINITELY gave him a bit of the side eye when he did the Conan/Fallon dig.

  18. April 29, 2013 at 2:23 pm

    Luv me so Ms MoFo Royale. That gif is truly giving. “BRObama” was killing em softly.

  19. Trina
    April 29, 2013 at 2:38 pm

    This is too funny! Why was I outside of the Washington Hilton on Saturday night trying to do a scavenger hunt item and they wouldn’t let me near that sucker! We had to take a photo on the wall where Regan was shot. That shit was worth 100 points! When we pulled up in the limo on the street to get out and I saw all the secret service vehicles and ambulance, I knew who was in the house. And that just made me all weak in the knees. Funny thing was seeing people who was supposed to go outside talkin’ bout, well, how did Jerry and Kath get in and get a table and we didn’t? Who did they know that we don’t? typical DC scene.

    Anywho… I was practically at Nerd Prom myself.

  20. Kizzakay
    April 29, 2013 at 10:06 pm

    Zero Fucks, and I am here for it. He’s so dope.

  21. Ty
    April 30, 2013 at 7:57 am

    Did anyone else peep President Fitz from ‘Scandal’ at the dinner? Musta been there to pick up tips! See him at 15:05.

  22. BLynne
    April 30, 2013 at 11:38 am

    I LOVED it when he was like ” Really…. You go have a Drink with Mitch McConnell!!” He ain’t got time for the foolishness any mo and he letting folks know it just got real!!!

  23. TeeNikki
    May 1, 2013 at 7:06 pm

    I cackled like a country bumpkin and all of my dambs are in the bucket with my President’s. That was fantastic and I would pay cash to see him in a show. All that snatching he did surely messed up his manicure and I know he had Mei Ling hook him up ASAP the next day.