Do Not Instagram That Hoe, Fat Joe

Not-so Fat Joe just released a lyrically-remedial track featuring Rick Ross and Juicy J called “Instagram That Hoe.” and I’m here to tell him to refrain from such a thing and I have a plethora of reasons.

Instagram That Hoe Rick Ross Fat Joe

0.5. You start the song talmbout “all my bad bitches report to Instagram right now!” Welp, there goes the neighborhood. (-_-) I say NAWL. Let them stay off it. For reasons. I’m not here for that.

1. Fellas, her name ain’t “that hoe.” She won’t appreciate you calling her that. You know her name was Thundalicious when you met her. Please address her accordingly. You don’t e’em know her life like that to be nicknaming her. You are rude.

b. You can’t just be Instagramming her all willy nilly without knowing what her favorite filter to use is. I mean, she’ont like “Inkwell” as much as she likes “Amaro” and had you talked to her more, maybe you’da know that, Joseph and crew. But you didn’t, did you? You just using her for her Instagramability. The filter makes ALL the difference in the world, sir and you picked the WRONG one.

III. Don’t be Instagramming that lady when you’ont know what her good and preferred side is. She might not like taking pics from her left side because it gives the illusion of her having a double chin. But you ain’t consider that in your haste to place her grill on the Instagrams, Schmedium Joey.

MJ k u wrong doe

4. What makes you think she didn’t wanna put that picture of herself FIRST on Instagram? I mean, if everyone already “liked” it from your account, then who’s gonna “like” it from hers? She had on her favorite #alphet with some killer shoes. She was READY to Instagram it but you beat her to the punch on some thirst. See? That’s that shit folks don’t like. You gotta consider her feelings and yours AT THE SAME DAMB TIME! It’s only right. (-__-)

5e. Here’s where you went really wrong. You tagged the wrong hoe girl to the picture. That’s a terrible shame, Skinny Joe.

And this is why you should NOT instagram that lady. You ain’t e’em have her permission and you were reckless with it.

But you know what, I know folks gon be at the club doing this when this song comes on:

Twerk Team gif 2

Unfortunately, we’re all impressionable. This song is simple as all to be dambed, which is exactly why it’s probably gonna be huge. And I’ll be facepalming its’ popularity very soon.

Still though. Self-govern. If you wanted to find things to post on Instragram, you could post a picture of Rick Ross’ bra. Or give us hints as to the size he wears. Methinks it’s 50GGG give or take a few inches.

I’m just saying.

So ummm… speak your peace.

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  1. October 11, 2012 at 3:43 pm

    I didn’t make it past the 0.5 – I din eem read what was next to 0.5 cause my giggle box got flip turned upside down. Lawd knows geography and I don’t go together so ion eem know much about decibels but that was funtee to me huntee.

    • October 11, 2012 at 5:20 pm

      I’m just saying…

  2. Lashawna
    October 11, 2012 at 4:18 pm

    Luvvie we need to talk about your numbering on this because I see a problem here. But I am hollering over here with this. Hollering. You going to have me kicked out real soon if I keep reading your ratchet filled foolishness on a daily basis. I might be okay with this. I can be homeless, but near an At&t wifi hot spot so I can continue reading your foolishness.

    • October 11, 2012 at 5:19 pm

      LOL I see nothing wrong w/ my numbering. YOUTHEWRONGONE!

  3. Margaret
    October 11, 2012 at 4:55 pm


    The end

    • October 11, 2012 at 5:19 pm

      I’ll say some nice words at your funegro.

  4. LuckBALady
    October 11, 2012 at 5:01 pm

    The MJ gif…I. Needed. That.

    • October 11, 2012 at 5:18 pm

      And I am here to supply! πŸ˜€

    • KMN
      October 11, 2012 at 7:00 pm

      Yes lmao MJJ was NOT amused at all…RIP


    • KMN
      October 11, 2012 at 7:01 pm

      Yes lmao MJJ was NOT amused at all….RIP


    • Shonte
      October 11, 2012 at 8:41 pm

      That Twerk Team dancing with them twerking legs and that Head Sprung head banging dancing. iDied then I was given life by that pic upon 2nd look.

  5. Nahjee
    October 11, 2012 at 5:16 pm

    Damn girl, why ain’t you posting Rihanna & nicki Minaj album covers on here yet.. If you want some hits you better get on you’er job girl

    • October 11, 2012 at 5:18 pm

      Keep it cute, ma’am. O_O

      • Nahjee
        October 11, 2012 at 5:29 pm

        *wait a minute* Luvvie don’t got luv for Rihanna & nicki anymore πŸ™ have you check out that grape juice site they be getting mad hits off of Rihanna name lol even rap up sits gets mad hits

        • October 11, 2012 at 5:54 pm

          Ri-Ri and Nicki STAY doing the most. If I wrote about every ridiculous thing they did, my blog would be 24/7 them.

        • Nahjee
          October 11, 2012 at 6:01 pm

          Know what U right tho… This is my first time on this blog site and you kinda give me that necole bitchie feel a little. Do you know her??? And do you visit her site sometimes???

        • October 11, 2012 at 6:33 pm

          Yeah I know Necole Bitchie. She’s a really cool chick and I do visit her site. I subscribe to it.

  6. Sierra
    October 11, 2012 at 5:27 pm

    That twerk team .gif just gave me my life. You are simply the best Luvvie.

  7. Tainette aka PurpleAfroPuffs
    October 11, 2012 at 5:42 pm

    This just made my afternoon. Dang even Disney has a Twerk team. hahahaha

  8. October 11, 2012 at 5:53 pm

    “You know her name was Thundalicious …”

    “Schmedium Joey … Skinny Joe”

    “Methinks it’s 50GGG”

    and then the Twerk Team gif?

    i have to go ma’am. my children are too young for me to explain why i’m falling out of my chair!

    • Cie
      October 16, 2012 at 10:50 am

      Kids gone be like… My mama last words were “Bury me a G and tell’em Luvvie did it”.

  9. Nahjee
    October 11, 2012 at 7:52 pm

    Yeah necole bitchie is a chill chick tho.. I’m just waiting on U & her to get mobile apps for ya blog site for people on the GO! That would be tight

    October 12, 2012 at 6:52 am

    this song is gonna get some dude slapped all in the face at the club taking pics of females to “instagram that h^*” and some female is not gonna like it and will commit bodily harm on that fool!

  11. RP14_96
    October 12, 2012 at 11:30 am

    Sooo…I’m listening to this song and as a Tennessean…this has Juicy J all over it…I mean Bands is his song 0____0

    You’re numbering is PERFECT for the riculounosity that is this song!!!

  12. Chantel
    October 12, 2012 at 2:55 pm

    Loving this 30 days of posting…that is all

  13. Jay
    October 13, 2012 at 2:00 am

    Its been days and I couldn’t rest until I listened to this song even though I listen not to most secular rap….for this reason. I must say the chorus is just so Memphis. Oh how I’ve missed you Juicy J.

    Btw, I ‘d like to thank God that I am no longer foolish enough to actually listen to the lyrics. 10 yrs ago I’d be instagraming myself while bumping this hard

  14. Nessa
    October 14, 2012 at 5:56 pm