Guess Who’s Bizzack?

I been gone for a minute now I’m back (but no jumpoff). Was I missed? Thanks to all my Guest Bloggers for holding down the fort. May your emails be sans Spam. Amen.

The conference I went to was THAT BIZNESS (literally & figuratively)! I thought I was a geek, but nope, I was proved wrong. It was like a Brain Trust of technology gurus there, and I got a chance to meet all those Social Media & Marketing Gurus that are in my Google Reader (Beth Kanter, Kivi Miller, Katya Andersen). Everyone there seemed to be an expert in Web 2.0 and new technology. Some people were even using tools I had NEVER heard of. ISH that was still in BETA stage. Me: *drool*

You know you’re at a Technology conference when the wireless network goes down and:

• there is outrage all around. Folks panicked
• during the Keynote speech, someone gets up to interrupt the keynote speaker that we have no internet. The whole room nods in approval
• Half the room (1200 people) pulled out their own portable wireless modems and plugged it into their laptops (which were 90% MacBooks)
• The other half of the room pulled out their iPhones & Blackberries and tweeted the entire speech anyway

Folks who weren’t there said they felt like they were because we all documented it so well. I tweeted the entire 45 min. keynote speech (under my Gig’s Twitter account) on my Blackberry. My poor thumb was in no shape to do much else afterwards. Jeebs be the cure for arthritis that we will ALL need soon enough. And lawd knows my poor eyes. They STAYED in front of my MacBook for most of those days. At one point, I was in a workshop taking notes on SilverKins when I saw my battery was low and on red. Right before I was about to *wall-slide*, the guy next to me took the cord out his MacBook and gave it to me to plug into mine. I cheesed like a fool and whispered a VERY enthused “THANK YOU!” Nice people make me show all 37 of my shark teefs.

I barely ate while in San Francisco because the food at the Conference was not my cup of tea. Twasn’t bad food, just not MY type of food. Bougie conference food + picky eater = fail & hunger. I was a shell of my former self by the time I got back. I had to fix that quickly. When I got back home, I ate 3 meals within 6 hours. I did eat one AWESOME meal in SF. Me and 5 other folks went to ChinaTown and ate some bomb food, which included scallops, shrimp (3 types) and of course, RICE! Twas delicious!

San Francisco. That city and its hilly streets are what folks go to Bally’s to pay for monthly. I walked up one of the streets, which felt like it had a 45 degree incline, and was wheezing when I got to the top. My thighs were burning and ish. San Franciscans must have gams of STEEL. Invincible hamstrings of glory. Legs of luxury. Shoot. There was no way for bikes to go down those streets without flipping over at least twice. EEK!

Also, I wasn’t aware of the fact that San Francisco does not really get warm. I thought I was going to Cali so warmth and sunlight would await me. However, I was mistaken. Apparently, the Bay doesn’t get warm because of the mountains and the water. But when you go an hour either way around, its like 20 degrees warmer. The entire time I was there, the high was like 55 degrees. To make matters worse, folks back in Chicago were like “Gurl, its 70 here right now”. I was like “Murphy, I hate you and your Law!” Jeebs be some Geography lessons for me.

I would say it’s good to be back home, but I’m heading to Michigan for another conference tomorrow. Landing in Detroit (Detroit, WHAT!) but going to Dearborn. However, I’ve already published posts for ya while I’m gone. Y’all know you and me us NEVA part!

P.S. another funny episode happened on the airplane on my way back. There was a point when the pilot made an announcement that we’d be going through some turbulence so everyone needs to be sitting with their seat belts on. Folks complied, then about 5 mins later, this Asian man that was in my row on the other side of the plane decided he wanted to get up for whatever reason. After what seemed like a couple of minutes, a voice came over the system.

Voice: *clearly exasperated* Sir, please sit down and put on your seat belt. We need you to sit down now! Please!

He sits, and everyone on the plane is looking at him. And I was chuckling silently because I’ve never heard someone be scolded like that on a plane. All was well (or so I thought). When we landed and the plane was taxi-ing around the runway, guess who gets up again? Yes, our favorite foolish man. Not only does he get up, but he steps on the edge of the chair of person sitting next to me, in the aisle seat, to open the overhead compartment. At this point, I think I was giving him the evil eye because I was just thinking “WTF are you doing?” This time, the voice that came over the PA was sooo irritated.

“Sir what are you doing? We are still taxiing around the runway. It is against FAA regulations for you to stand up while the seat belt light is up. SIT DOWN NOW! SIT.DOWN.”

Talk about getting told about yourself. I’da been like “Sir, sitcho happy *ss down before I come back there and sit you down myself. FOOLISH IJOT”. But I guess what the stewardess said was much more professional. I just don’t understand his lack of plane etiquette comprehension. Even if he couldn’t speak English, the light that indicates that one should have their seat belt on should do the trick. Even if he didn’t understand that, this is a time when Groupthink was appropriate. The fact that NO ONE else got out their seat should have let him know he needs to be sitted too. A mess. I had to give him a lethal side-eye.