True Confessions of a CEO (I’m Tired!)

Here’s a REAL confession: I don’t enjoy being CEO of my company. Running a business is HARD.

I know LLC Twitter and the boss babes and mindset moguls of Instagram make it seem like it’s vacays and zeros in bank accounts, but it’s EXHAUSTING. Team building, endless decisions, operating outside of your genius by necessity and insurance.

On Sunday, I spent 7 hours doing work that was necessary, because if I didn’t do it then, it would have derailed my week. ON A SUNDAY, ya’ll. Sunday Funday, where? 

I’m a visionary who LEARNED to build. I’ve built my company to a multi-million dollar entity because of AND in spite of myself. Leadership is so hard. It’s constant learning and unlearning. It’s checking yourself first. It’s expectations. It’s clear communication. It’s strategy. It’s tactics. It’s forecasting.

I use my left and right brain simultaneously and some days, I feel like banging my head against the wall.

Being a CEO is reading profit & loss statements. It’s worrying about whether our SOPs are done. It’s approving invoices. It’s reviewing proposals. It’s quarterly, annual strategic plans. It’s taxes. It’s revenue and cash flow management. Yes, others on the team do it but you OWN it.

I’m frequently aware of the fact that, sometimes, I’m in over my own head. But I am QUICK to tap on coaches and people smarter than me to keep me aligned. One thing I’ll ALWAYS do is ask for help. I’m the person most aware of my own flaws. I am fine saying “I have no clue.”

To run a successful small business is to be someone who is both CLEAR on their vision, OPEN to re-writing the map to get there, ADEPT and SKILLED while also GROWING and LEARNING, LEADING but willing to FOLLOW those who know more. It is spinning on your head while also walking.

Some weeks, Friday comes and I fist pump at how it went, as CEO. Other weeks, Friday afternoon has me looking like this:

However, I will say that I’m exceptionally proud of the work I do and what I’ve been able to build. Again, because of, and in spite of myself. I do great work. Plain and simple. And so the things that I HAVE to do, in order to do that great work, I will do them. Being CEO is one of those.

I’ve written THREE New York Times bestselling books. I have a TED talk that has been seen 8.5 MILLION TIMES. I’ve retired my mom. All because of this CEO work I do. I’m really proud. And I’ll keep going and growing. And I’ll keep growing as a leader. I’ll keep doing great work.

So yeah… all this glorification of entrepreneurship that folks do gets on my everlasting LAST nerve! People get on Blue Ivy’s internet and act like building a 7-figure company is just about mindset. NO. It is about being a decisive, flexible, growth-oriented forever student.

Shoutout to all the “soft life” girls. Joining you in being a Lady of Leisure is the plan. One day. But many of us don’t have the privilege yet. Cuz if I don’t work, my mama’s rent and health insurance doesn’t get paid. 

SOFT LIFE HARD FOR ME!!!