Whose is this?

Whose Bocs (Bald Locs) Are These?

I promise that people step out the house talmbout how casket sharp they are and they walk out with this homie’s hairstyle.

Bocs Bald Locs 2

I DIE. This is like a mullet of different species. It’s as if the mullet said “I need to upgrade for the 2014” and this is what it evolved into. It’s business in the front and rasta-chic in the back. WERK, sir. WERRRRK!

If he walked in a room and he was talking to you, you wouldn’t even know that he was rocking 3 different hairstyles. And they say women are indecisive. Dude got a regular caesar in the front, bald in the middle and locs rolling down his back. I’m so confused that my confusion is perplexed. He seems to be at a festival too. Figures.

I wonder what’s gonna happen when his baldness continues to spread. Will we ALL hear the locs scream “HOLD ON, GUYS!”

As a loc-rocker myself, I don’t know whether to cackle at him or call an emergency committee of the Loc Wearer Coalition of the world and ask if we need to ex-communicate this dude.

Look what Stevie Wonder (ye of no hairline left) started with his bald locs. Just look at this. BOFADEM need to let go and let God with these hairs of theirs.

A change should come. Guys, know when to go bald gracefully.

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  1. denise
    October 29, 2014 at 9:44 am

    See, all he needs to do is coil those things up on the top of his head and BOOM! Instant hair turban. Hairban?

    • October 29, 2014 at 9:52 am

      My husband and I were watching this show about combovers (don’t ask) and this magician had the most epic of combovers. He had not hair on the top of his head and three long scraggly strands. With those and some hair spray he crafted himself a more majestic boufant than Bruno Mars. This was like three years ago and we still talk about dude.

      • Christina Joy
        October 29, 2014 at 11:41 am

        OMG! I had to google that clip because I needed to see the combover and you are right! That joint was epic! http://youtu.be/5M2ap5JznqE

        • MsZ
          October 29, 2014 at 5:22 pm

          What the what?! I am truly baffled!!

        • Lisa
          October 31, 2014 at 12:48 pm

          OMG, that was too funny!! And amazing indeed!

        • Clare
          November 13, 2014 at 3:37 pm

          Amazing. He made something out of nothing.

        • Alexis
          August 3, 2015 at 10:23 am

          ???????????????????????? He is a cold piece! He needs to be giving out comb-over lessons…..

    • October 29, 2014 at 5:07 pm

      iDie!!!!! Over and over and over after watching that Youtube. That man really is a magician! LOL! We need to get deadlocks (typo and it stays) dude a session with that guy.

    • Lauren
      October 29, 2014 at 10:43 pm


  2. October 29, 2014 at 9:44 am

    His head looks like an octopus. I feel so bad for him on behalf us with nappy and full locs. Some “folks” aren’t meant to loc. Period. If you KNOW you got male pattern baldness all up and through your family, why even try?? Perfect of example of a person not knowing when to let go and let God have His Way………

    • coquinegra
      October 30, 2014 at 2:02 pm

      DEAD. His head looks like an octopus.
      I need to banish Luvvie and all her friends…
      I’m not going to make it…

  3. Claire
    October 29, 2014 at 9:49 am

    Luvvie! Hilarious as usual. But, I know you care greatly about these things: I think you meant to type “indecisive” instead of decisive!

    • October 29, 2014 at 9:52 am

      Fixed! Thanks.

  4. October 29, 2014 at 9:49 am

    lol, I was thinking his head looks like a jellyfish.

    • October 29, 2014 at 10:33 am

      Me too! Portuguese Man-of-Locs!

      • KayMee
        October 29, 2014 at 12:27 pm

        I’m am DEAD at “Portuguese Man-of-Locs!”

  5. Shar
    October 29, 2014 at 9:51 am

    Stop! Did someone put a bowl on top of his head to grow around the middle? In the words of Princess Elsa. (Frozen)………Let it go, let it go!!!

  6. October 29, 2014 at 10:55 am

    You’re sure it’s not John Travolta? Or an extra from that Scientology movie of his?


  7. October 29, 2014 at 11:02 am

    meanwhile, that struggle tee is about 2 inches away from telling me how many Pabst Blue Ribbons he enjoyed last night…

  8. October 29, 2014 at 11:12 am

    Franciscan chanting up top, dancehall in the back. I am unable…

    • October 29, 2014 at 12:40 pm

      #MUERTE Lola!!

    • mobaygurl
      October 31, 2014 at 4:37 pm

      omg, i’m choking!!!

    • August 3, 2015 at 10:23 am

      Franciscan monk chanting up top, dancehall in the back. NO WORK WILL BE DONE TODAY. I’m done. Crying, dying, done.

    • Chattinatti
      December 11, 2015 at 5:56 am

      You’re not right!! I spat half my cereal out my mouth with this! *leaves to wipe screen and grab my puffer while I’m at it!* 😀

  9. Binky Melnik
    October 29, 2014 at 11:54 am

    Oh, fer crissake. I’m ashamed for my people. Please, ignore us and pretend we’re not here.

  10. October 29, 2014 at 11:56 am

    “Loc Wearer Coalition” I just died! lol #CRINE

  11. October 29, 2014 at 12:29 pm

    That poor man is having an identity crisis. I just know his name is Bob and Bob Marley is his spirit animal.

    Random: I noticed his butt and my mind heard Big Freedia say: toot it in the air.

  12. crl
    October 29, 2014 at 12:49 pm

    time of death 1:49 p.m. LMBO

  13. Melissa
    October 29, 2014 at 12:50 pm

    I’m a proud loc wearer myself, and whenever I see people looking like this, they never look me in the eye. Almost as if they know better, but can’t help themselves. Please…help yo’self.

  14. Heather
    October 29, 2014 at 1:14 pm

    Locs by Leviathan
    Coiffure by Cthulhu

  15. paleo_wino
    October 29, 2014 at 2:08 pm

    This style is now called the Squidward. You’re welcome.

    • Drea823
      October 29, 2014 at 2:43 pm

      Squidward! I. Am. Hollering!!

  16. notconvincedgranny
    October 29, 2014 at 2:54 pm

    Maybe it’s like some of my plants – if you pinch those long, stringy runners back, the plant (scalp?) will put energy into thickening around the top.

  17. Malika Abdul-Basir
    October 29, 2014 at 3:45 pm

    Bwahahaha pruning is needed ASAP!

  18. dirtychai
    October 29, 2014 at 3:45 pm

    Lord have mercy. This dude’s head looks like a Sentinel from The Matrix.

  19. October 29, 2014 at 8:49 pm

    Scissors anyone, he needs to just let it go!!!

  20. October 30, 2014 at 10:29 pm

    Lawd Rasta-chic. I wonder where exactly would one purchase such hair-wares? Looking like a mop that’s made its way around the cook county jail a few too many times.

  21. jenjenjones
    October 31, 2014 at 1:41 am

    All he needs is a rasta hat, he coulda pulled it off! Maybe it was windy right before the picture was taken! He shoulda glued that sh!& down…

  22. August 3, 2015 at 10:27 am

    There is a guy here who has a giant beard, is bald on top, has about 3 inches of fuzzy hair, then about 2 dozen tiny baby locs sticking out in every direction. It’s like he got a buncha tarantula legs stuck in his hair by accident.

  23. Marci S
    August 3, 2015 at 6:10 pm

    you have to learn when it time to let go. Even papa pope let go of his.