Nigerian People are Prayer Warriors and These Videos Have Me Howling
I’m getting ready for my trip to Nigeria all this week so I won’t have a chance to write a lotta posts. BUT foolery still surrounds me and I must share it with y’all.
Us Nigerian people are a passionate lot, and we love us some Jesus (well, those who are Christians do). You haven’t heard prayer until you’ve heard a Naija person pray and give God the glory. We cover everything with the blood of Jesus and we take it above and beyond often. We take praise and worship very seriously because Christ is our patronus.
@Aphricanape06 on Instagram posted the video below and blessed me with hilarity on today (yes, ON today). I’ve watched it no less than 10 times.
“Every computerized snake. Every elongated cockroach.” I AM CRYINNNNGGGG!!! Lmaaaoooo! Real tears are pouring from my eyes. It’s funny because it’s true. This fervent prayer is rebuking everything in the way. Now, I’m not sure what a computerized snake is. I keep picturing the snake game that used to come with all our cellphones where screens were still in gray. But I won’t question it.
And then there’s part 2.
“The witches and wizards have failed successfully.” *tears* SEE VOCABULARY! HOO MY GAWD! I am unable to stop laughing. And I must adopt this phrase. Whenever someone does something foolish, I will say they “failed successfully.” It is done.
But yeah. This is why sometimes you don’t even wanna tell your parents that something is wrong because you don’t wanna be subjected to 15 minutes of revival when you’re on the bus stop. All you wanna do is commute and you’re on the phone tryna whisper “AMEN.” But then you hear “I DON’T HEAR YOUR AMEN!” so you shift in your seat and try not to disturb the entire bus.
If you tell someone you’re cold, the prayer you might get could go like this (according to my girl @Ayodeli):
“May the God of holy fire SET ABLAZE any manner of snow, ice, frozen precipitation, subzero moisture IN THE MATCH-LESS-NAME-OF-JESUS!”
LMAO! And AMEN O!!! I receive it in HiS MIGHTY NAME!
I love us. We are so extra in every way (sometimes to our own detriment though but that’s for another day). How many times have you watched these videos? I’m probably up to 20 by now.
Shoutout to Aphricanape06! I am now on his IG watching ALL the videos.