Harriet Tubman Was Bout That Life and Bout That Freedom
Yesterday was Harriet Tubman aka Araminta Ross’ birthday. Considering that I love me some HARRIET for being the ultimate goon before gooning was the new black, I had to dedicate something to her. Below is a convo that happened in a late night Gchat between me and my girls over a year ago. It’s appropriate as we celebrate Harriet, Top Flight Underground Railroad Security of the world.
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Z-Baby: I’m pretty sure Harriet Tubman woulda loved to lay up in a hammock reading freedom papers, but again, people have been rude since the dawn of time
VEG: lmao at reading freedom papers. I loved when I read in school how Harriet carried a pistol and threaten to shoot fools who were to too tired to keep going where they stood!
Z-Baby: LMAO @ Harriet!!!!
VEG: and yeah: Harriet was gangsta. “You keep walking to freedom or you die right here!”
Luvvie: and Harriet was the FIRST gangsta.
Z-Baby: mini confession: I used to be kinda intimidated by her (I knew she was dead) but she was antebellum HOOD. like, would she have shot me??
Luvvie: lmao!!! Not antebellum hood
VEG: lmao. She was like “You ain’t gonna stop so you can get caught and mess this up.” Harriet got you to freedom whether you were serious about it or not. She LEFT her two brothers who were late to show up at the meeting spot. They weren’t about freedom. How you gone be late to the escape?
Luvvie: hahahaha Harriet: “Bish, is you down for freedom or what??? Cuz I aint got NO time to play these bald-headed shackled games with you. You in, or out? Wassup??”
VEG: Harriet: “I’m bout this freedom. What you bout?”
Harriet was ’bout that life. She was ’bout that freedom.
Luvvie: hahahaha!! not “I’m bout this freedom. what u bout?” *dead* I imagine Harriet to be an antebellum madea
VEG: bwaaaah at antebellum madea. I try to imagine: would have left my brothers? Answer: yes. Lol
Z-Baby: LMBAO exactly! I have 4, so I know ONE of them would be left
Luvvie: lmao and you KNOW Africans can’t be on time. Underground Railroad is s’posed to be well-oiled machine. Negros gon have you late as hell. Massa woulda BEEN caught up to the plan effing with Africans.
Z-Baby: and I’d hope it was my youngest brother. Mute ass ninja. moody and don’t ever talk, then once a year he wanna fill you in on what he been thinking the whole year. Poof! Vamoose!
VEG: Of all times to be on time, this was most important. I think making sure you make your connection with the freedom train is critical.
Z-Baby: I’d take a nap to prepare for the long trip ahead.
Luvvie: Your youngest bro don’t say jack??
Z-Baby: he is so WEIRD
Luvvie: Well it means he can keep a secret. We can give HIM the code to spread to the others.
Z-Baby: Then he comes up to me twice a year trying CONVERSATE. and everyone cuts their eyes at me like “he done chose u to speak with, speak to him.”
Luvvie: as they shine a spotlight on you
VEG: Z, I think he’d make the freedom train. lol. Seems to me he’d be on time.
Luvvie: Yup he ain’t gon be behind making convos like the rest of the late coloreds
VEG: He won’t be chit chatting, saying goodbye and ish
Luvvie: Or telling someone they ain’t shit cuz you know we good for that
Z-Baby: oh no, he would have been at the site, RET TO GO
VEG: Can’t you see it? “I’m heading north today and I wanted to let you know, before I go, I hate you azz”
Luvvie: hahahahahaha *dies* “Let me take this opportunity to tell you that your mama ain’t shit. goodbye. see u on the free side.”
VEG: lmao I’d have done that
Z-Baby: girl, so would I. “bish, chicken george be thankin bout me when he out in the field with you”
Luvvie: I’da been late talking shit bout what I was gon do up north and how I was gon rock them “city folks gear” hahaha
VEG: LMAO at Z
Luvvie: NOT chicken george!!!!
Z-Baby: WHAT IS WRONG WITH US?
Luvvie: iCANNOT with us!!
VEG: Nothin. Araminta Ross is a she-ro. She deserves to be celebrated
Z-Baby: I have long been intrigued by george and kizzy. ole kambe bolongo faces. LMBAO @ bell atlantics voice
Luvvie: bwahahahaha
Z-Baby: that’s what I call him btw
Luvvie: isweahfoVishnu I need to quit u
VEG: my older brother would be late to the freedom train cuz he’d be trying to get these damn kids together. I’d be like ‘hurry up now. we got to move’
Luvvie: I’d be late cuz I’d be draggin my sack of rice I ain’t wanna leave to waste
VEG: LMAO To you. I’d say “negrette. How u gone cook that rice? We can’t start a fire. It’ll attract the dogs! Drop that ish!”
Z-Baby: I’d be late cause Harriet and I were beat on the same day, I’m narcoleptic too. and I KNOW I’d get beat. I just got an attitude with a cop in dc. My girl was talking between her teeth like ”iswearzifyouhaveusherelongerthanweshouldimanevaspeaktoyouagain”
Luvvie: lmao
Z-Baby: I was like, get off my seat!
We are dumb and ridiculous! Then as if that wasn’t foolish enough, VEG went and wrote a poem for our she-ro, Harriet. It went a lil something like this:
Gooning for Freedom is what Araminta did.
Ms. Tubman you gave us free.
When we were too tired to keep it movin’.
Your revolver put life in our tired feet.
“Go on or die” you said
While you held the muzzle to our head.
You was ’bout dat freedom
And if a fool was late you’d leave ’em.
Leading mo fos through the bush,
On a trip that was so far.
Dodging dogs and massa
Following that north star.
Comin’ back again and again
Risking yo own life
To bring others to that freedom light.
Leading armed revolts
Telling white suffragists where they could go.
Yous one badass bish.
Weezy, Jeezy, Dopey and Sneezy…
They ain’t got nuthin on you, a real gangsta.
*DEAD*. iQuit ALL of us. We are RUDE. This is what happens when you don’t go to bed on time.
Oh and since Harriet Tubman was bout that freedom, what YOU bout?
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22 Comments
Harriet was truly bout that “Get Free or Die Tryin'”
There is only one book I remember having and loving as a child and it was my picture book about Harriet Tubman & the Underground Railroad. It rhymed and everything
*sigh* How I love her.
P.S. This!
“Z-Baby: girl, so would I. ‘bish, chicken george be thankin bout me when he out in the field with you'”
Sent me to the *Ray/Eddie Murphy from Life voice* “Up-pah ROOM!”
YESSSS!!! Harriet got her gun on ANYBODY who wasn’t bout it.
Every time I say you guys have gone to far with your gchat foolishness you surpass yourselves.
I nearly choked to death reading this.
I’m done with your blog for real this time.
LOL my gchat is ALL outta order. I ain’t E’EM lying to you!
Ya’ll got issues, love it! iDied @ this: Z-Baby: girl, so would I. “bish, chicken george be thankin bout me when he out in the field with you”
Z-baby was dumb as hell for that. It STILL makes me laugh
Ah, the memories!
Good times, good times.
Yes indeedt!
*I swear I hatecho ass!* I’m ’bout it ’bout it when it comes to my freedom!! I would have left my younger and older sisters, cause they can’t show up for shit on time!! My oldest would have still been sitting on the edge of her bed trying to figure out what to wear (bish, throw on some sweats and lego). My younger sister would have still been in the bathroom trying to tie up those waist length locs of hers (tie a rubber band around those bishes and lego)….
LMAOOO @ “lego.” YESSS
My co-worker just called me to make sure I was okay because I was in my office cackling at this post! Next time, I need to shut my door before I open AwsomelyLuvvie. Loves it!
Or learn to cackle silently! lol
BWA HA HA HA HA! This is foolery raised to the infinite power. I definitely laughed my bootay off reading this, and even suh-li-vahd on mahself a couple times. Y’all choco-chicas is crazy!
LMAOOO @ suh-li-vahd! Chile, u stoopid!
yall crazy as hell!!!…idonedied over and over again…”bish..chicken george be thankin bout me….”LMAO!! Luvvie tellin the other slaves they aint shit and gon rock “city folk gear”…and z-baby’s family…”he don chose u to speak with..” OMG!! YALL GONE TOO DAMN FAR!! I aint neva read black history as funny as this shit!!
We make history bout the people (esp those who was bout that freedom). You’re welcome! lol
Like Jem, Luvvie is truly outrageous.. *smh*
*cackling with laughter*
HA! You took it back!
*DEAD* at “You KNOW Africans can’t be on time” ROTFL
I would not have been late for that FREEDOM train and I would have left folk!!!
Y’all crazy fo real!!!
Africans DO be late! We’re not a prompt people. It’s not in our genes.
hahahahahahahahahahahaha probably my fav post now. Everyone lookin at me at my desk liiiikkkke is she okay??!? YES, IM FINE!
Hehehehe 😀