Kirk Franklin: The Christian Goon We Need
People are gon get their asses popped in the name of Cheeto Satan. After the UNCONSCIONABLE and UNJUSTIFIABLE Muslim Ban that Tangerine Voldemort ordered, folks found themselves feelin froggy. Christians who actually want to be Christ-like renounced it loudly, and that included Kirk Franklin, gospel singer and pocket preacher.
He was minding his business and showing love to our Muslim family when some trogolodyte decided to reply with a threat. See how one of God’s children handled it:
LET HIM KNOW! In JESUS NAME, try me if you want to! 1,000 points for this Christian goon. Folks gon let the holy trick them into getting mollywhopped in the name of the Father, Joseph’s stepson and the Ghost. What Kirk lacks in height, he got in bullets and what you ain’t gon do is threaten to roll up in his house.
I dropped this on my Facebook and we had a field day.
Ebony: “For those of you who think that gospel music has gone too far…You ain’t seen NOTHING YET!!!! Do you want a revolution?!!!” – Kirk told that man “Try Jesus. Not me!”
Nicole: I promise the STOMP, the whole STOMP, Nothing but the STOMP…
Sarah: Kirk singing “Stomp” as he beats up home intruders like “Oh brother can’t you seeeeee. …I got that victoryyyyy….STOMP!”…..crunch….bones breaking…
Kehinde: Kirk pretty much said “I wish you would… in Jesus’s name!” buhahahahha!
Aeisha: My dad is a minister holy ghost filled man of god and he’ll tell you “Give your soul to jesus and your ass to me” he plays ZERO games and will blow a hole clean through you. And pray for you in Jesus name.
Angela: People forget how Peter cut off that man’s ear off. Don’t get it twisted, sanctified people will fight too.
Shalom: I remind folks Jesus said, “I don’t come in peace, I come with a sword.”
Linda: Jesus flipped tables too.
Kim: I remember my preacher daddy taking me to a boys house he caught me with in the house. My dad took a gun and sat it on his lap and told that boy’s dad don’t let your son find Jesus before he wants to. No one at my school ever wanted to date me after that.
Althea: Biblical translation of “Catch these Hands”
Kim: From the book of First Pettylonians: “verily thee have asked and thus thy shall receive…a beat down”.
Tina: Kirk said, “I wish a negro would come for my family…turn the other cheek, my ass”
Shalom: He’s got 1st Class seating during the Blaxit.
Stacia: Oh yes, Christians can get down too. We wasn’t always saved. And hey, Jesus didn’t “ask” the merchants to leave the temple, He was whippin fools!
James: Roll up,” in Jesus name” – Kirk Franklin
Nana: Jesoz name, you gon catch these holy-ghost-olive-oil-santified hands. Hallelllluuuuuuuyyyyaaaahhhh.
LaShundra: Just like Putin said “vengeance might be the Lord’s but it’s my job to send you to him”. Only thing he said I’ve agreed with lol
Shonda: The clap back is EPIC! Lolololol. Don’t fool with the man who penned ‘Stomp’ and asked you if you want a revolution… cuz you will wind up getting more than your feelings hurt. Amen. #headnod
Natasha: Brother Kirk said “Don’t let the skinny Jeans and Jesus fool ya!!!”
Rock: Right. Folks think because you a Christian you won’t protect yourself. Folks better stop playing dumb. You can’t come at folks about their kids and expect a real nice response.
Brenishia: Kirk said come catch these Christian hands. Let me help you get to know Jesus and meet him.
Heather: Apparently Kirk was in church the day they taught …What would Jesus Do DOES cover … beating people up and kicking people out your house if they don’t act right. Them money lenders can tell ya.
Andrea: My Daddy used to say, “That’s how God gets angels, you ready to become one?
Peta: That’s right Kirk! Kirk said come on so I can make you meet the Lord in person…Amen.
Lisa: Kirk said he’ll sit the Father, Son, and the Holy Spirit on the shelf for a minute to show bruh a few things!
Gwen: As Madea says..”.Piece Be Steel” and “Hold Your Piece, and let da Lort fight your battles…Hallelur”
Carol: Somebody buy that T shirt that says “Don’t let your President get your ass whipped”
Kaye: IDK what made ppl think Kirk Franklin is a punk. His little ass always got something to prove.
Robert: When you have to turn into your alter ego Plies to let people know “homie don’t play that!”
Tamra: He’s about to make his fists rain down like the melodies from heaven.
Heather: Kirk was like, you can have a blessing and these hands.
Chris: Kirk aka Plies Franklin said . . . To those of you in the struggle, this ain’t what you want. #ClapBackGospel #TheFireNextTime #InJesusName #HeyMan
Harmony: Can he get a witness?
Sigrid: Twitter fingers turned back to trigger fingers real quick!
Linda: Don’t let those tight pants fool ya. He’ll personally introduce ya to the Man he sings about.
Kira: My dad always tell people “I ain’t always been a church goer. Okay? God bless!”
Jenni: Look at Rev. Sassypants!
Keisha: Amen!! Kirk said he WILL arrange a meeting between you and your savior.
Sitta: And provide refreshments in the form of a baptism
Keisha: Baptism and repast. 2 for 1. Let the chuuuch say..
Alexis: *sips communion juice*
Gloria: Love it! He’s like…. Come thru if you want, see what happens…. In Jesus name!
Karisa: Run up, get done up in JESUS’ name!!!!
Cicely: Don’t come for Kirk unless he sends for you!
Jennifer: Cuz that’s Plies’ brother for real. #Goonz
Eunice: Thus forth I will now end all of my e-thuggin posts with “In Jesus name” in hopes that God will work things out in my favor.
Tainette: I declare “In Jesus name” 2017’s new “Bless your heart.”
Arlisa: Kirk Plies is not here for the games.
Tianna: Kirk said “I ain’t a killer, but don’t push me!”
Sheri: Somebody bout to catch them holy hands
Cherie: When the hood I come from jumps out of the a good Christian I’m trying to be.
Miracle: Kirk is about 4’11 3/4 with church shoes on. I swear to it…I’ve stood beside him. And he can spin and jig with the best of ’em. But Uncle Kirk just set them straight.
Karisa: Kirk got his heat, Mahalia and Shirley, ready to introduce you to your Maker.
Melissa: Somebody on another post said that this convinced them that Kirk and Plies were separated at birth. I literally fell the hell out…
La Dadriel: Somebody said Kirk ran off the plug twice.
Tonja: YAAAASSSS GP ARE YOU WIT ME, OH YEAH WE GOT THESE HANDS WE AINT GOIN NO WHEAH
Candice: He said if you walk up on me and mines “YOUR life is in MY hands”
Tishika: Kirk got them one way tickets to Glory for him.
Adetoun: Even Jesus flipped a few tables.
And it was well.