Kirk is a Despicable Dustrag and Momma Dee Meets Her Match: LHHATL Episode 12 Recap
I was still cussing Kirk out for his wack ass escapades from last week’s Love and Hip Hop Atlanta when this week rolled around. We left off as the dusty degenerate in denim closed the door of his cabin room, accompanied by two wayward women. This latest episode picked up after this jacuzzi incident.
Trifling Trollop Threesome – Kirk and his duo of doting dolts are frolicking in bed, and clearly getting ready to engage in unholy undertakings. I wanted to gag at cankerous Kirk cheating on his wife on TV and at the trifling trollops who were accessories to his wackness.
Bro Briefing – Kirk and Benzino meet up to debrief about their good times in their temporary brothel. Kirk and his distressed denim vest of dumbassness tells his boy that he had the time of his life. The response he got was “You wasn’t turned up, Kirk. You broke the knob.” Zino expresses his reservations about his behavior, since he’s married. The fact that Spongebob SquareZino is the voice of reason this season is nothing short of terrifying.
Wiggity Wack – K.Michelle is at a wiggery (that’s what I imagine a wig store should be called) looking for new hairhats for her upcoming tour. Ariane shows up and asks K if she can sing backup for her. SCREECH! WUT?!? So that’s her angle. She’s tryna be a singer? Chile… bye. Anywho, K tells her she needs to audition like everyone else.
Lettuce Pray Love – Mimi is summoned to some restaurant by Steebie the Sociopath, wondering what is so important. Wells, Stevie asks her for “lettuce” and she puts 2 and 2 together and realizes “head of lettuce,” which then means “head.”
Yeah, girl. We can’t believe you’re still putting up with this foolishness either. Pic from VH1.com
That nut job REALLY had the unmitigated gall to ask her for sex. And when she laughs at him and says no, he brings up the BMW he bought her. You know the one we ALL knew would be used as bait by him? That one. She promptly hands him his keys, walks out and calls a cab. Good for her! Even though she shoulda never accepted it to begin with. But baby steps.
Pondering Pawn – Erica meets up with Momma Dee to talk about Scrappy’s financial support of her daughter since he’s locked up (they won’t let him out). Scar tells her that she is going to exercise her rights as a granny and look after Emani. You ain’t got no right, Momma Dee! You’re grandma and mom is present. Chill out! Anywho, Erica tells her she’s thinking of selling her engagement ring to secure money for her and Scrappy’s daughter and Scar encourages her to do that.
Doubting Drew – Drew goes to Traci’s apartment with flowers to apologize for his behavior in the presence of her new boo.
He tells Traci he wants to take her and Shawn to dinner to talk and to question the man who will be around his son. Drew don’t give a damb about a new man in his son’s life. He is just all concerned about Traci’s Love Pocket. Tuck in your cock blocking, sir.
Ariane’s Awful Audition – K. Michelle holds a bootleg version of American Idol auditions with 3 other judges, to find her new backup singers. When Ariane steps up, she starts by telling the judges that she’s sick. That was clue 1 that this was about to be a mess. And from the first note that escapes her throat to the last, awfulness abounded. She sounded like a dying cat, and when the big boy on the panel expressed this, homegirl gets butthurt. In the confessionals, K agreed by saying “She looked a lil funny looking. And when she sang, she sounded just like she looked.”
Ariane cannot carry a note in an indestructible bucket. Bless her heart.
Diamond Decision – Erica goes to the jeweler to sell the engagement ring Scrappy gave her, and she brings Momma Dee for some reason unbeknownst to logic. The jeweler says if he buys the ring from her, he’ll give her $10,000 but she can NOT get it back if she changes her mind. The other option is to put the ring on consignment and he can get her $15,000 for it. She chooses the latter option (in case VH1 wants to buy it back but I’m sleep).
House-hunting Hoodboogers – Master Splinter and Joseline are house-hunting, at her behest. She wants a bigger commitment from him and this is what it looks like, I guess. They end up in the bedroom of the house they’re looking at and JoHe (Joseline Hernandez for short. Go with me here) straddles him until he gives her the answer she’s looking for. You’ont do that in someone else’s bed, fool. Ugh. Joseline has disappointed me GREATLY in her new role as Mimi 2.0.
Turnt Up Tarts – Traci is having an event and invites her “good friend,” Bambi, to model. She sure knows how to pick amigas (first, Shay and now her). Her crew is so hoodrat and basic broad-full. As she mingles after, she walks up to Bambi, who is with Kirk, Mary Jane and Benzino. When she tells her how they were at a cabin “turnt up,” Traci looks at Kirk and confirms that he’s Rasheeda’s husband. The boo boo the fool look on Adam’s Apple was priceless. Like she wasn’t supposed to know who he was. Mary Jane, the other fool, then adds insult to injury by talmbout she took Kirk’s free pass. This is nothing to be proud of, you damb harlot!
Oh Shay. Sometimes, it takes one to know one.
Shay wasn’t in this ep but this gif felt right.
Momma Meets Match – Momma Scar has summoned the minions of her invisible kingdom for a party to give an announcement. Turns out, Scrappy scraped his way outta jail and is FREENAYEE. Erica hasn’t talked to him since he went in so it was a surprise to her too. She pulls him aside and tells him that she sold her engagement ring and he has the nerve to look hurt. Because in his opposite day brain, they were gonna make their ultra broken relationship work. His bad reaction to this sent his mama into hysterics. As she starts yelping, Mingnon, Erica’s mama, comes outta nowhere. Madame was in braids, a pair of leggings that said she ain’t give a damb (she’ont give a fug) and a cropped top that showed she’s always ready to FIZNIGHYEE.
Mingnon felt like Momma Dee was feeling froggy and she was about to leap on her until security grabbed her and Scrappy pushed Erica away. WHOOOO! It was going to go DOWN. As those ladies left, Momma Dee asked us all the question “Mirror Mirror on the wall. Who’s the fairyest of them all?” I don’t know who’s FAIRYEST (O__o), ma’am. I can’t answer that. I DO know who’s the craziest though. You win THAT crown.
Momma Dee met her match, doe.
Traci Tells – Traci goes to Rasheeda’s house and tells her what she found out about Kirk’s whereabouts from the past couple of days. His turnt upness and all’at. Yes, Traci, girl. That’s a good friend right there. TELL ME if my dude is traipsing ’round with a troop of tramps. With so much hurt in her voice and with tears in her eyes, Rasheeda says “Your married ass don’t need to be turnt NOWHERE.” Damb right, girl. Get him together when you see him. And right then, he walks up. Traci excuses herself because it was about to get ugly.
Burning Betrayal – Rasheeda asks Kirk if he’s really been up to no good, and it’s a question she wasn’t really looking for an answer to. She wanted an apology but what she got was blame. That awful animal basically blames her for sticking his peen in some other chick because she told him to “do you.” And then he tells her that he was drunk. I wanted someone to dropkick him in the throat. Such a damb coward!
Rasheeda was NOT having it and that pitiful cuntrag she calls a husband runs in their house and locks the door behind him. So she had to walk to the front to get in. By then, he had hopped in his car. She goes in the house, grabs his clothes and a match and throws them on the lawn. Don’t wait to exhale, girl. BURN. HIS. SHIT. RASHEEDA! BURN IT ALL! ALL THEM DISTRESSED DENIM VESTS! BURN THEM ALL!!!
Chile… I’m so unable. Kirk is THE WORST! THE WORST! Allow me to use this GIF again. Because no one expresses this like Jean-Ralphio.
How do you throw away 15 years of marriage for a tryst on national TV like what you built is really that disposable? Wack. I hope Rasheeda leaves him because she can do bad all by herself.
Anywho, next week, we’re in for a treat. You know Rasheeda’s mama, Miss Shirlene, ain’t here for Kirk’s bullshit. She goes AWF for her baby girl. So that should be good.
So whatcha think of the foolishness? Would you have burned Kirk’s clothes? And if not, then we need to get your thuggier friends who will.
P.S. HELL YEAH, ALLITERATION!
It is time to write that book. Come into The Book Academy and learn how to go from IDEA to INK.
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45 Comments
Yesssssssssss Luvvie! Couldn’t have said it better!
I couldn’t have laughed harder if Benzino was standing before me flexing!!! “No neck ass”
I wanted her to BURN AWL O’DAT denim. No man worth his salt wears denim vests with his twitter handle appliqued on. Chile cheese and tough grits with a side of fuggouttahere! Ole signifying monkey ass Kirk…
Um, WHEN #praytale is Momma HE gone sat her masculine ass down somewhere? (and why FO did Erica trust HER to tell her to sell that ring? Whatever Scar said, she should’ve done the OPPOSITE!)
Scrappy scraping his SCUM ass outta jail all to get the po po called on him again by his babymama? That’s some FOOLYIZNAYEE!! If he’d quit listening to Scooby…I mean, Scar…shit, whatever…then he MIGHT be able to collect the nuts his squirrel ass is looking for in life.
Ariane. No.
Hoe’saleen…Hoe’saleen. You are NOW “the maid”.
Luvvie…can I take this back just a bit and ask what in the stumped hell was Bobby V’s ass doing hosting a basic bish pawty ANYWAY?
Can you hear that….? You just made me flatline! *dead* x_x
Hoe’saleen!!!???? *_* Nothing but ashes left, that cremated my soul!
Thank you for the recap. You were on point!!!! New subbie!!!
I think the “fame” has gotten to him. Last season he was a kitten with a capital P, and a few ppl called him on it at the reunion. So now this season he’s in hyper masculine, “I’m famous so follow me on twitter oh you don’t know my handle just check my denim vest” mode. And he’s whack for it.
Now in regards to tonight, regardless of if she said “Do you” “Do her” or “Do yourself” he knew what she meant. Which was “GTFO of my face.” She did not give him permission to forget their vows and have multiple infidelities ON TELEVISION with other women… While she’s at home pregnant. And he knew this. He’s just in his feelings about her wanting to take charge of her career because he wasn’t making it happen for her.
I just hate she didn’t use some kind of accelerant on those vest.
LOL!!!!
I know!!!! that’s what i was screaming at the tv “rasheeeeeeeeeda, you need an accelerant boo!” LOL I loved when Traci said ” we can see you Kirk, you’re in the open!” he was just out and about like he wasn’t doing shit. but i think this is all staged bc Rasheeda is still as pregnant as ever and she is appearing in PUBLIc with that dude, so…she’s not mad anymore, LOL
Nawl. He knew he was busted like a Isley Brothers song when she came over. That Adams Apple started jumping like Kirk was in a sing-a-long!
I refuse to watch this show, but I LOVE your recaps. I haven’t looked forward to a recap on a blog this much since Rich at Fourfour used to summarize “America’s Next Top Model” LOL
“Her crew is so hoodrat and basic broad-full. ”
I fell out at my desk. I couldn’t have said this better myself.
Erica’s mama is about that life! I was ready for her to get Mama Dee!
Did anyone else notice Kirk backing up as Rasheeda got closer to him? That baby had her face spread like peanut butter and nutella on texas toast and he just looked at her in digust!
Did u hear her say ” if it was halle berry a bitch wouldn’t mind”. What? She must not know Halle has been cheated on several times!
LMAOOO at “spread like peanut butter and nutella on Texas toast”!
I was rooting for Rasheeda until she said that Halle Berry thing. Basic bxtch mentality that cheating is a little more acceptable if the chick looks better than you. #girlbye
i think she meant that if he had cheated on her with Halle Berry she really would have given him a pass.
I think she meant cheating with a woman that was “worth” something instead of the group of women he was with. (that still wouldn’t make it okay)
Lets talk about how Mary Jane is the same one who slept with Shaq AND she gone be on Toya husband Mistresses of ATL show. But Rasheeda and Toya BFFs. A mess. That sweet Kirk not fooling anyone. He still don’t like girls.
Alliteration game on poinT for these scenes!
I am SO mad at you and the Scrappy lingo. HILARIOUS!
It was great! LOVED Rasheeda calling Benzino “no neck ass!” LMAO! Kirk is an idiot and tends to forget his children will view this and see how he treated their mother, especially the one on the way.
I think what Rasheeda meant by the Halle Berry comment was that she could understand/accept it more if Kirk had cheated with a woman of some kind of status; i.e. a successful Hollywood actress rather than some low budget rent-a-hoe hoodrats who get passed around at parties. That’s definitely a bigger insult.
I held my composure til you said FREESNAYEE. Didn’t think it was possible to choke on lettuce. I almost died!!! Lmfao.
Was I hallucinating or was Benzino dropping words of wisdom?
FREESNAYEE????
*DEAD*
I really need to learn to stop reading these recaps at my desk!!!
I am crying with laughter over here!!! I love your re-caps!
“Whew!” was all I was able to express after last night’s episode. But I am happy to see that Mimi is making some “progess” and gave Stevie his car back.
Trash. Trash. Trashy ass Kirk, whew! I can.not.
Furthermore,
Scrappy should THANK Erica, cuz now HE can go buy back the ring he was so “hurt” about being pawned. What ELSE should she have done? Save it? For what sir, for WHAT? Work WHAT out? SIR? Good day.
jfhskjafhkgh I can’t get past the SHADE SHADE SHADE GIF/Meme….LOL….I had to cover it up so I could read……*crying*
Whooo when I tell you I was PISSED security stopped Mingnon. I wanted her to make boots outta Scar and her atrocious leave out Mammy Dee met her match that day. The kingdom has been sacked.
I can’t wait for Ms. Shirlene to whoop Kirk’s arse!
I keep requesting for Mona to replace Scar with Mingnon and Shirlene.
Is everyone forgetting how Rasheeda has shown herself. She all but told him to get on, that their relationship is over, humiliated him in front of many people, took money out of their account (20K) to do a video that they did not agree on, she got that different producer, she she she.
Don’t make it seem like Kirk is such an asshole that he just went and did that. he has been disrespected by his wife over and over and over again.
Does that not matter?
He shouldn’t have cheated on her, but to say poor Rasheeda, is wrong. ain’t no poor nothing.
It was fine to kick him out.
Pause, @ amy girl no. Kirk went to his wife and ask for a damn D.N.A test, accused her of cheating all while being a scummmy ass negro he is WRONG,
If your In a marriage it isn’t over tell the divorce papers are signed.Period, And why shouldn’t Rasheeda embarrass him in front of a few people when he been digging and diggin’ at her and that’s just what we saw on Camera.
Kirk allowed a bump in their marriage to become a crater and that shit is not cute nor fun nor Appropriate. It’s just gross especially since he has children that are all old enough to work a T.V and see their daddy be less then horse shit. so you can satdown.
i second the motion that filet mignon and momsheeda replace mama scar, they’re hardly on the show and way more entertaining imo.
i couldn’t believe scappy pushing erica straight across the room like that…i felt bad for erica but laughed at how she went from super turnt up to quiet exit in seconds tho.
kirk is vile, water is wet, arianne likes chocha etc…
he can “catch fire” with his shady boots, members only vest wearing self
Okay so we all know Kirk aka the Brown M&M is pure filth. BUT what I ain’t know was how Mignon is THICK doe. I hope to have a body like hers at her age LOL.
Anyways, Imma play D.A. and say Ariane’s singing voice wasn’t all that bad…she has potential…but she shouldn’t really put that potential to use. Talmbout she’s going continue on her music, chile WUT MUSIC. QUIT.
I am proud of Mimi for calling that cab, she has never looked so damn dignified. Stay strong in the back seat of that cabbie girl.
Rasheeda and Kirk’s scene made me wanna book a flight to the ATL so I can shade the eff outta Kirk. Like how the fuck are you really gonna
1) LOCK YOUR BABY MOMMA OUT?
2) RUN.
He is such a fucking coward who does not deserve to breathe even the most polluted of airs.
P.S. If you check out Mary Jane’s twitter, this bish actually has a song out called ‘The Other Woman’. I couldn’t make this up even if I wanted to.
I just think nothing is more upsetting than Kirk’s vest.
Luvvie, chile I wanted to jump through the tv and drop kick Kirk’s punk b*tch ass. I am still so vex about this! Can’t wait to see Mama Shirlene go all the way off on doltish ass.
Kirk is single handedly trying to bring Cross Colors color blocked vests back from 1992 and it’s sad. I wanted to set him on fire every time he said,”I have a pass.” To eat a lot of cake, not to have a nasty threesome on TV.
I love/find it disturbing that Scar thinks ATL is Pride Rock and she’s got some kind of kingdom. Not anymore!
I shouldn’t watch this show, but I can’t quit watching this show. Every time you think the script can’t get any worse, it does!
Why is no one else confused at Drew’s Jamaican accent? It threw the whole episode off for me after that tho
drew said he was west indian in an interview i saw with him and track on youtube.
He’s Jamaican. If I’m correct, there was a Jamaican flag magnet on his fridge in one of the early episodes.
I would bet money Kirk fell asleep snooring and slobbing as soon as the cameras stopped rolling. He ain’t done nothin. ..aaand scene.
There is no excuse for Kirk’s behavior period. 1st telling Resheeda to have an abortion, then stating he was tired of kids, then the cabin. He acting like he is simply making a career change. Personally he doesn’t even deserve Sheeda. But if that is what she wants and they are married then someone should have told his dumb arse that being a husband and a father is a full time, 4life job. There is no me, me, me, step up to the plate and be a man, take care of yours . WTF, he look like a dummy and he acting like he lost his mind right about now. The Halle Berry thing just means it would have made the situation less embrassing, not that, even that was OK .
Mimi, love her, she should have kept the car and told Stebee to kiss her arse, because he’s gonna be a thorn in her side anyway. May as well have something to show for it.
Josey ain’t worth my time.
AND M*Dee need to sit her arse down, with her once upon a time mentality, that Queen don’t even have a Castle, she got that Chile jacked up. ( they should have called child protective Services on her long time ago).
Love the Recap.
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Am I the only one who noticed that when Traci went up to Bambi, Bambi blurted out “it was nice to meet you!” Is that something someone says to a good friend?
When a man accuses you of cheating, you better believe he’s cheating.
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